Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Facebook Status Messages or Whatsapp updates and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Avatar = Awesome. I wish the whole world was in 3D!!!
←Rate | 01-20-2010 04:40 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Waves hand " This is not the Facebook Profile you want."
←Rate | 01-20-2010 03:59 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Sometimes you feel like a nut. And sometimes you feel that the men in white coats are just overreacting.
←Rate | 01-20-2010 03:20 by (the real) lemonpillow Comments (0)  

   messageicon santa just touched my no no spot. :(
←Rate | 01-20-2010 03:11 Comments (0)  

   messageicon A Lion Would Never Cheat on His Wife, But a Tiger Wood !!!
←Rate | 01-20-2010 01:55 by EDK Comments (0)  

   messageicon If a Dog Sniffs Your A*s, You're Probably a Bit*h
←Rate | 01-19-2010 23:45 by EDK Comments (0)  

   messageicon Here's a warning. If I'm really sick and I say "I gotta yak", it doesn't mean that there's a longhaired buffalo living in my backyard
←Rate | 01-19-2010 23:22 Comments (0)  

   messageicon logged into your facebook account and starting fights with everyone on mafia wars...
←Rate | 01-19-2010 22:59 by Comments (0)  

   messageicon just hacked into your facebook account and admitted to all your friends that you have a serious drug problem and need an intervention ASAP!
←Rate | 01-19-2010 22:50 by Comments (0)  

   messageicon logged into your facebook account and sending friend requests to transexuals
←Rate | 01-19-2010 22:36 Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks the most used sexual position amoung married couples is doggy style, the husband sits and begs and the wife rolls over and plays dead.
←Rate | 01-19-2010 21:16 by mullerman Comments (0)  

   messageicon Okay people, if you are driving a small car, and are not towing a trailer or driving a semi; you have no business coming into the left lane to negotiate a right turn
←Rate | 01-19-2010 21:15 Comments (0)  

   messageicon How to eat an Oreo: First you twist it...... Oh it broke...
←Rate | 01-19-2010 20:45 Comments (0)  

   messageicon logged into your facebook account and rearanging your farm!
←Rate | 01-19-2010 20:36 by Comments (0)  

   messageicon If money grows on trees, I wanna be in the shade.
←Rate | 01-19-2010 20:11 Comments (0)  

   messageicon People need to pay not a money tree, and I dont work for free.
←Rate | 01-19-2010 20:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I actually saw some video of where I was when I went to Haiti and the sad thing was not much had changed.
←Rate | 01-19-2010 20:05 Comments (0)  

   messageicon only going to marry a very old man with a very bad cough...
←Rate | 01-19-2010 19:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon (RAH)² (AH)³ + [ROMA (1+MA)] + (GA)² + (OOH)(LA)²
←Rate | 01-19-2010 18:00 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Bartending at the Betty Ford Clinic
←Rate | 01-19-2010 17:54 Comments (0)  

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