Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 4468 of 6446

If your plan A doesn't work, don't sweat it. The alphabet has 25 more letters.
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07-26-2011 04:07 by Zep
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If you hate Trump now, think how much you'll like him if Hillary get elected.
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08-20-2016 08:37
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When I first noticed you from across the room, I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life avoiding you.
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08-14-2020 06:15 by Fazzy
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Popeye's Chicken is offensive to guys who have ridiculously large forearms with anchors tattooed on them and really skinny girlfriends.
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06-19-2020 06:46 by Fazzy
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Trump's wives are proof that you do need immigrants for jobs that American's don't want to do.
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11-11-2016 15:53
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In her defense, Kellyanne Conway was misled by the toaster.
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03-14-2017 05:17
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Justin Trudeau should have asked Donald Trump what year the War of 1812 took place.
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06-06-2018 23:20
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In order to keep his family involved, Trump has appointed Melania head of the Department of mining, given her background as a gold digger.
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04-06-2017 15:32
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If someone can explain to me how stealing and destroying is a panacea for easing racial tensions, I'm all ears.
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06-01-2020 13:47 by Fazzy
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It's just another Maniac Monday, wish it was Sunday 'cause that's my fun day!
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07-12-2010 09:35
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aww, I feel really bad, I was sitting in the club havn a drink with some friends and a random girl tried chatting me up, all I said to her was ''would you like some face with your make up''....haha was funny though! Oi cake face!! Haha
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08-21-2010 22:55
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"Gaga" = A Form Of Dodge Ball ..... Lady Gaga = Lesbian ..... Lesbian = Literally Dodges Balls ... Coincedence ? ... I think Not !
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04-18-2010 04:44
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considered atheism, but there weren't enough holidays.
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06-22-2009 18:35
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When I'm a billionaire, I will use cats instead of toilet paper.
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05-28-2014 13:43
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Justin Bieber, why you no die drag racing like Paul Walker?
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01-23-2014 09:21
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When someone ends their posts with "just sayin" I would love to smack the sh!t out of them and poke their eyeballs out with an ice pick....other than that I am having a great day!!
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10-20-2011 17:18 by urboyblue
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obviously all these people hatin on Occupy wall street HAVE a job.
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11-17-2011 00:08
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In a lesbian relationship who makes the sandwich? Neither they both eat out.
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05-31-2012 07:12
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How the hell do Edward Scissorhands And Freddy Kruger wipe their a@@?
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05-28-2011 19:46
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What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!
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06-06-2011 22:21
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