Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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wrong mac miller that died ya big dummy you got a computer research it 
The Philadelphia man that bought a $4.00 painting but inside is a $2.5 million dollar worth Declaration of Independence document. Ok the song Philadelphia Freedom comes to mind
Thank God for Pancakes and Tang.... They taste the same from when it goes down till you throw it back up!
You;re so annoying you should have a SLAP named after you.
A Friend suggestion with 1 mutual friend!? Really facebook?? Has it gotten that pathetic? ..smh.
â– Nothing is forever. Especially people. Don't have your hopes high, Friends become strangers, Lovers become friends, & People leave.
Dear Harry Potter fans,, Of course Star Wars fans are better than you,, We even have our own holiday,,,, Sincerely,, May the 4th be with you !
Redneck word - Aspect: she got done skinny-dippin', passed out on that deck chair, and had her aspect by a woodpecker.
it's not that I don't go Church because I don't believe a God. I just don't go because I have trouble believing in the concept of a God who makes a note of who does go to Church.
Noticed a mistake? Why couldn't you notice it FIRST before posting? Why were you in a hurry to microwave your dinner-for-one as you always do?
The current US population stands at over 300 million. If we all contributed $1, that would be enough to buy off many lobbyists. I'd be happy to be the receiving officer for this plan.
If I don't have any drama... Can I still have a Facebook
Nothing is more humbling than blocking someone then doing the friend request of shame
Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything, and everybody believed in you?
Wondering if your adopted because your the only sexy one in the family.
When I was a child I performed on TV for a very short time. Mom came in the living room, saw me up on it, and made me get down though.
My lifetime ratio of bananas purchased to bananas eaten is running about 5 to 1.
Fah-Q, Fah-Q and Fah-Q!! Whose next?
you know we're getting lazy as people when you see "ready in 5 minutes" and you roll your eyes
my life's story is too far different from yours so please stop questioning and judging me 