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X is just another brick in the wall
X says It takes 10 people to change a lightbulb because 9 of us are on Facebook.
X says "Doh!, the stuff that buys me beer, Ray, the guy who sells me beer, Me, the one who drinks the beer.Far, a long run to get beer, So, I'll have another beer, La, I'll have another beer, Tea, no thanks I'm drinking beer and that's why I'm not here! "
X says It's easy to identify people who can't count to ten. They're in front of you in the supermarket express lane.
X says It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
X says Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
X says I got a postcard from my gynecologist. It said, "Did you know it's time for your annual check-up?" No, but now my mailman does.
X says Use this for•The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
X says •Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know “why” I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
X says •When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.
X says •Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf.
X says Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?
X says How do you keep a New Orleans Saint out of your yard? Put up goal posts.
X says Gene Police: You!! Out Of The Pool!
X says Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
X says The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
X says There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
X says What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'
X says Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
X says The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.