Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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IRISH and PROUD! 
have you ever notice that Chris Brown, Usher, Nelly and 55 Cent look exactly like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles???
maybe if all these slackers went out and got a job, then they wouldn't have to worry about Obamacare
Did you know that if you spell "Go hang a salami" backwards it comes out as "I'm a lasagna hog" ?!?!?
Your so vain you probably think this post is about you
I really hope, for humanity sake, that you people were all up in arms and angry when the picture of Obama and the noose surfaced.
Tiger Woods is now dating Lindsey Vonn. That man gets so much ass, if this were 1800's his slave name would be Poonta Kinte
knows the difference between a straight girl and a lesbian. About a bottle and a half of wine.
Maybe we could get Obama to take ISIS seriously if we convince him they are behind global warming?
recycle...because mother earth likes to regift too
asks Where Were You When the Republic Died?
Chicago police say Crime is at an all time low today, When asked why they responded with "we think it has to do with the extensive flooding, how many blakc ppl do you know that can swim'?
Every week almost 30 people die from FDA approved drugs while Marijuana remains illegal with 0 deaths.
Big trucks should only be allowed to drive in one lane and we will call it the sucky driver lane
Only 2 more days of black history month, thank god, I'm tired of eating chik and watermelon. Thats how it goes right?
President Obama should of shoved his birth certificate up Donald Trump's @ss
I just saw an entire ginger family walking their dog. You could see the shame in its eyes.
climbing in your windows & snatching your people up. Hide yo kids. Hide yo wife.
Would like to thank all you Colt fans for talking so much Sh!t it makes winning so much better!
Fact: Soccer is a game invented by European ladies to pass the time while their husbands cooked dinner. Go practice your throw-ins, you cheese-eating surrender monkey! 