Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Has anyone demanded to see Trump's birth certificate? Just to make sure he was actually born and not summoned.

   Mexico has the same problem the US has.........Too many mexicans.

   ObamaCare: Prescription for disaster.

   BEER - Helping white men dance since 1881.

   if Charles is in Charge of our days and our nights, who's this God guy people are talking about?

   Wondering what's gonna happen to that Hindu ass wipe from Rutgers College who played a prank on the poor guy who committed suicide when he goes to prison! I wish the guards secretly tapes Ravi getting raped and put it on the web

   I would consider becoming Catholic if they made Batman Pope.

   UPDATE: I'm still handsome.

   What's with everyone calling it "Holiday decorations" back in my day, we called it a little something like Christmas.

   Catholic Priests rub me the wrong way.

   Government just came out with a new doll...It's called a welfare doll. You wind it up and it quits working.

   If Mama Cass had shared her sandwich with Karen Carpenter they both might be alive today.

   Women...why is it so hard to F-in fill the gas tank? The E doesn't stand for ENOUGH!!

   If Robert E Lee were alive, I would vote him for President

   What is the job application at Hooters like? Do they give you a bra and say "Here. Fill this out."?

   Bush's "recession" was a lot better than Obama's "recovery".

   Like for republican, dislike for democrat

   Here is a hint to Bruce Jenner: You were born a man. You will die a man. That is simple biological fact, and has nothing to do with your 'feelings' or whatever you think is 'hidden' inside of you.

   Ron Artest - Metta World Peace, that's his name now, only gets a 7 game suspension for cheap shot in the NBA. Do we live in a society that rewards bad behavior? What's next, an endorsement for elbow macaroni?

   Why do I hate people who are in relationships so much?