father OR dad Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Who among us has not proclaimed into the whir of a fan, "Luke. I am your father."
←Rate | 12-14-2010 13:10 by Sara Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
←Rate | 02-03-2011 16:32 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was raised by my father----my mother left before I was born.
←Rate | 03-02-2011 13:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A wise man once told me, "You are not the father"! Thanks Maury!
←Rate | 03-06-2011 16:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Someone's been eating my porridge!", said Father bear. Mother bear sighed and poured him another bowl. Life was tough and draining for her, now that her husband was suffering from Alzheimer's.
←Rate | 03-09-2011 00:02 by manbearpig Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
←Rate | 03-26-2011 17:29 by mark Comments (0)  


   messageicon Had Maury Povich been in Star Wars, we would have known who the father was a lot sooner
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon loving him some father son and holy spirit right. I love ya Jesus
←Rate | 04-13-2011 18:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I met with my new girlfriends father for the first time yesterday. The first thing I said to him was, "Sir, you and me have something in common.." "What's that son?" I replied "Your daughter calls us both Daddy"
←Rate | 04-14-2011 15:37 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maury told me "You are Not the father"... That just made my day!
←Rate | 04-22-2011 01:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he's wrong.
←Rate | 04-24-2011 23:27 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon He's really got his father's scalp.
←Rate | 04-29-2011 11:52 by Geoffrey B Comments (0)  


   messageicon some say that Justin Bieber is the father of Rebecca Blacks baby....but its not true...There is no way 1 girl can impregnate another
←Rate | 05-15-2011 08:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.
←Rate | 05-17-2011 01:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “... of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone.” Matthew 24:36..If God has not even revealed to his own son the date the world will end, I doubt he has revealed it to Harold Camping.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 23:15 by joe fool Comments (0)  


   messageicon My new favorite thing to do is slip a kid $20 while his parents aren't looking and quietly whisper: "This is from your real father."
←Rate | 05-26-2011 18:44 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon one of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world.
←Rate | 06-17-2011 00:50 by MTQ Comments (0)  


   messageicon In the spirit of Father's Day, my best advice to you: "Keep your "business" in your pants, and always wash your hands".
←Rate | 06-17-2011 11:40 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  


   messageicon seeing all these profile pics of old men in honor of Father's Day is giving me the creeps. My wall looks more like a list of sex offenders..
←Rate | 06-18-2011 13:25 by me Comments (1)  


   messageicon To all those that use our competitors brand...Happy Father's Day From the people of Durex
←Rate | 06-18-2011 18:53 Comments (0)  




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