love Funny Status Messages

   I love Facebook like Angelina Jolie loves to fill out adoption papers

   Cupid. That makes sense to me, because nothing fills me with love more than a fat baby firing arrows at my butt.

   I am going to write a book about A.D.D., because I love fishing.

   "I just called to say I love you." -Stevie Wonder not understanding how prank calls work

   All I know about love I've learned from my dogs, which is when someone scratches your back you should roll over and show them your nipples.

   If we are in a car and I love the song that just came on the radio and you turn it down to tell me something, please know that I will cut you.

   DAUGHTER : “I am in love with the neighbor, so I am running away with him.” DAD: “How is he going to take care of you when he doesn't even have a job?” DAUGHTER: “Dad, I am only reading the letter left by Mom.”

   ahh young Love. Full of promise, full of hope. Ignorant of reality

   I don't care if people call you the space cowboy, gangster of love or Maurice. I think you're delusional.

   My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.

   If I were invisible the first thing I would do would be to beat the crap out of a mime. The people would love it!

   if you've been married less than a year, stop with all the love and marriage quotes. S hit will eventually hit the fan...

   Met a lady yesterday...It was love at first sight...Then I took a second look !!

   Dear Me, I just wanted to remind you that it's okay to say "No" once in awhile. I'll let you in on a little secret-the world will go on! Love, Me

   Process of liking a song: 1 Day: I love this song! 1 Week: Hey that song's good. 1 Month: Turn that s$it off! 1 Year: OMG, I love this song!

   It's interesting how people claim to love/like their jobs, but ready to go home as soon as they get in the door.

   Things you should never do after a breakup: 1. Listen to love songs. 2. Read old messages 3. Read their statuses, tweets or updates.

   Love is like your shadow...the more steps you make towards it the further it moves away from you...but yet it follows you around your whole life.

   thinking maybe Doritos can bring back my love life like it did for Grandpa...

   For those of you who can't be with the one you love because she doesn't understand that you're destined to be together, Happy Restraining Order Day!