Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Submit a Status Message
Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
2967
2968
2969
2970
2971
2972
2973
2974
Next»
Most Recent
Page: 2971 of 6446
Judging by how The Hulk speaks, he reacted badly to grammar rays as well.
17
9
←Rate |
05-31-2012 11:11 by
flinnie
Comments (
0
)
Dance like no one is watching or just stop dancing in public you weirdo.
17
9
←Rate |
06-06-2012 07:47 by
flinnie
Comments (
0
)
I got caught talking to myself today, so to avoid embarrassment, I pretended to be a tree until they left.
17
9
←Rate |
06-16-2012 12:51 by
K-Mac
Comments (
0
)
Little Boys shouldn't play Big Boy games.
17
9
←Rate |
06-28-2012 17:49
Comments (
0
)
I hurt my back playing golf today,I fell off the ball washing machine.
17
9
←Rate |
07-12-2012 22:24 by
Rokkn
Comments (
0
)
I just thought of something. What happens if you become addicted to cold turkey?
17
9
←Rate |
01-29-2012 20:03 by
Mickey
Comments (
0
)
The worst part about eating with vegetarians is everything.
17
9
←Rate |
02-27-2012 09:22
Comments (
0
)
Proving other people wrong with your success is pretty selfish. Proving everyone else right by failing miserably shows you've got class
17
9
←Rate |
03-01-2012 00:58 by
flinnie
Comments (
0
)
Closed due to hangover. But don't worry, I have a note from my bartender.
17
9
←Rate |
03-04-2012 11:13
Comments (
0
)
Man Rule #4: Never let your Wife be the last one on your street to bring the trash bins in.
17
9
←Rate |
11-19-2011 00:15
Comments (
0
)
Kid birthday parties should just be called get your child sick gatherings.
17
9
←Rate |
12-05-2011 13:16 by
SuthernFukr
Comments (
0
)
I found out I don't have testicular cancer. My dentist told me after I woke up. Nice guy, he didn't charge me.
17
9
←Rate |
12-14-2011 19:21 by
@CarlosdRooster
Comments (
0
)
Who give's a rat's a$$ if its your first time to post here! Stop trying to get some attention and post something funny already.
17
9
←Rate |
12-17-2011 03:00
Comments (
0
)
Little-known fact: that Quaker guy on the oatmeal box is naked from the waist down.
17
9
←Rate |
03-07-2012 13:31 by
SuthernFukr
Comments (
0
)
We really owe it to our friends to tell them when their baby is ugly.
17
9
←Rate |
03-15-2012 02:00
Comments (
0
)
I always cry at the end of Shawshank Redemption because Andy never finished carving that chess set.
17
9
←Rate |
03-31-2012 07:12 by
flinnie
Comments (
0
)
Facebook feels a lot like Group Therapy...only everyone is talking at once and no one wants to be cured
17
9
←Rate |
04-01-2012 21:02 by
snotty
Comments (
0
)
I phoned the Procrastinators Helpline... They took my number and said they'd get back to me :/
17
9
←Rate |
04-03-2012 20:52
Comments (
0
)
You know your Twitter timeline is boring when you get unfollowed by a spambot.
17
9
←Rate |
04-09-2012 21:18 by
@iJokes_
Comments (
0
)
I was reading the ten commandments and got to "thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife" and I remembered where I left my wallet.
17
9
←Rate |
04-16-2012 12:28 by
Marshall the Great
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
2967
2968
2969
2970
2971
2972
2973
2974
Next»
Most Recent
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com