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Vodka is practically a health drink. That is if you call it potato juice.
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12-02-2017 08:18
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You know it's cold outside when you go outside and trip over dog poop instead of stepping in it
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12-02-2017 04:04
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Whoever said technology will replace paper... has obviously never tried to wipe their ass with an iPad
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12-02-2017 04:04
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I can finally join the crowd that says THE BOOK WAS BETTER now that most movies are about comic book heroes
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12-01-2017 22:58 by
markf
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If you survive any given fashion fad, you are allowed to wear it forever according to my dad
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12-01-2017 22:53
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Took the kids to the zoo today and spent the first 30 mins explaining why the animals are not in alphabetical order like their favorite book
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12-01-2017 22:51
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1st of December and I already gained 3 pounds. Fml.
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12-01-2017 22:01 by
Yatusabe
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You can’t say that President Trump hasn’t Tweeted you well.
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12-01-2017 19:07
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President Trump has golden hair like the Golden Child of mythic olden tales. Like, everything that he touches turns to gold. #GoldenPOTUS
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12-01-2017 19:04
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Gotta listen to the little man inside. The little man knows all. Unless, your little man is an idiot.
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12-01-2017 19:03
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Breaking news: Santa Claus accused of sexual harassment for having girls sit on his lap and asking if they are naughty.
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12-01-2017 18:34
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Funny how Flynn went from "lock her up" to maybe being locked up.
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12-01-2017 17:51
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Wouldn't recommend hanging up mistletoe at the office this year.
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12-01-2017 17:46 by
pj
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The problem with talking to people on the phone is that they expect you to pay attention.
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12-01-2017 15:05
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If white privilege exists, then why did Senator Warren have to pretend to be an Indian?
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12-01-2017 10:17 by
Blackmail
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This is probably not the year to hang mistletoe around the workplace.
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12-01-2017 09:18 by
MarkM
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The Denver Broncos today announced Al Bundy as their new starting Quarterback.
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11-30-2017 13:49 by
TallMtnMan
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Teacher said taking responsibility is key to being an adult and she asked what’s wrong today and who do we blame? Student (7th grade) - I blame all of us for Nov 8th, 2016. Sums it up right!
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11-30-2017 08:37 by
Harry
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Today's relationships, you can touch each other but not each others phones
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11-30-2017 04:02
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I've learnt one very interesting thing about money......It doesn't buy "CLASS" no matter how many millions of it you have got
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11-30-2017 04:02
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