nfl OR football OR superbowl Funny Status Messages

   I live by my father's motto: "Life is a football game. Try to fall asleep in the first quarter and complain if anyone shuts off the TV."

   Depression usually creeps in at the end of the football season, but this year I'll keep myself happy by viewing the highlights of Peyton Manning expressions!

   I would like to see a soccer player play real football and a real football player play soccer and see who cries first.

   jeezo ya thick tit, can ya not make the connection between american football and rugby?? ya eejit....

   Here in London we play football with our feet and we wear helmets when riding bikes

   I get it, American football was made after Americans realised they sucked at rugby.

   Explain this egomaniac yanks, world champs? When its a NATIONAL league? Football when you use your hands? instead of follow up highlights its who had the best commercial? Pathetic overconsumption unhappy society.

   Damn Yankies and their football. Who plays football using hands anyways? Girls maybe.

   Let me know when these lame american football jokes are over. Soccer > American Football.

   "This was the best football game I've ever seen!" -Guy who's never seen a football game.

   the stanley cup > a silver football

   The best part of this superbowl tonight was Facebook and Instagram!

   The Broncos should just sit on the sidelines and watch the Superbowl for the commercials like the rest of us.

   I was discussing NFL football with a friend when he asked ‘When was the last time the Redskins had a decent season?’ I replied ‘I think it was 1491, the year before Columbus discovered America.’

   We get it, ESPN. The superbowl will be cold, you don't have to remind us every 5 minutes.

   If on Superbowl Sunday, The Broncos win,, I'll shave my chest hair and glue it to the top of my head,,, If they don't, I'll wait till the day after.

   Superbowl 48, 2 teams from the only 2 states 2 have legalized pot, I'm guessing tht their "secret" of success is a bowl of "weedies" every morn 4 breakfast

   At this stage of the football season, all I care about is #s and food.

   Seattle vs Denver..Washington St vs Colorado...marijuana SuperBOWL..

   Obama said he wouldn't let his son play football bc he fears it would cause dementia. Someone should tell Obama that he doesn't have a son.