Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5464 of 6446

No one can do everything, BUT everyone can do something!!!
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11-24-2010 14:02 by CJ
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Vu ja de: When you are in a situation that reminds you of something that will happen.
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11-24-2010 13:12
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everybody is celine dion in the shower..
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11-24-2010 13:04 by cmadden10
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Like a good neighbor, Mr. Rogers is there
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11-24-2010 12:26 by BABABA
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just realized that Superman was an illegal immigrant
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11-24-2010 12:24 by nick
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Goldfish and animal crackers.....Her favorite kind of surf and turf
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11-24-2010 12:01
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thinks people who end sentences with prepositions should knock it off.
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11-24-2010 11:43
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Deja Fu: I've been kicked in the head like this before...

praying I don't get gravy on my nice clothes.
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11-24-2010 10:20
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wondering what all the Vegitarians are doing for Thanksgiving.
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11-24-2010 10:19 by Steve OH
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going thru the airport scan today with a complete spiderman suit under my street clothes

Todays lesson: You WRITE a letter or note. You TYPE an e -mail, message or text.
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11-24-2010 09:22
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thinks people with parkinsons just have a good song stuck in their head
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11-24-2010 09:09 by Yaj
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likes being vague, because it's almost as fun as doing this other thing.

at the airport and not too upset about going through a full-body scan... what I am REALLY upset about is that this Enzyte stuff totally DOESN'T WORK AT ALL!
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11-24-2010 08:20
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There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

Do you want to make a difference? Be different.

It's a good thing I have Facebook. Otherwise I'd be doing something dumb right now like being efficient at my job.

I often view the Thanksgiving table as a roulette table, something about potato salad and macaroni salad made by people that don't like me makes me think I would be safer in Vegas betting the house and car
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11-24-2010 08:08 by SEAN
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The future of TSA, ma'am bend over, spread your cheeks, cough!
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11-24-2010 08:00
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