Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon No one can do everything, BUT everyone can do something!!!
←Rate | 11-24-2010 14:02 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Vu ja de: When you are in a situation that reminds you of something that will happen.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 13:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon everybody is celine dion in the shower..
←Rate | 11-24-2010 13:04 by cmadden10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Like a good neighbor, Mr. Rogers is there
←Rate | 11-24-2010 12:26 by BABABA Comments (0)  


   messageicon just realized that Superman was an illegal immigrant
←Rate | 11-24-2010 12:24 by nick Comments (2)  


   messageicon Goldfish and animal crackers.....Her favorite kind of surf and turf
←Rate | 11-24-2010 12:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks people who end sentences with prepositions should knock it off.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 11:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Deja Fu: I've been kicked in the head like this before...
←Rate | 11-24-2010 10:22 by mickeybruce Comments (0)  


   messageicon praying I don't get gravy on my nice clothes.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 10:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering what all the Vegitarians are doing for Thanksgiving.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 10:19 by Steve OH Comments (0)  


   messageicon going thru the airport scan today with a complete spiderman suit under my street clothes
←Rate | 11-24-2010 10:16 by mickeybruce Comments (0)  


   messageicon Todays lesson: You WRITE a letter or note. You TYPE an e -mail, message or text.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 09:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks people with parkinsons just have a good song stuck in their head
←Rate | 11-24-2010 09:09 by Yaj Comments (3)  


   messageicon likes being vague, because it's almost as fun as doing this other thing.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 08:39 by Michael Askins Comments (0)  


   messageicon at the airport and not too upset about going through a full-body scan... what I am REALLY upset about is that this Enzyte stuff totally DOESN'T WORK AT ALL!
←Rate | 11-24-2010 08:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 08:15 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do you want to make a difference? Be different.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 08:15 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's a good thing I have Facebook. Otherwise I'd be doing something dumb right now like being efficient at my job.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 08:14 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I often view the Thanksgiving table as a roulette table, something about potato salad and macaroni salad made by people that don't like me makes me think I would be safer in Vegas betting the house and car
←Rate | 11-24-2010 08:08 by SEAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon The future of TSA, ma'am bend over, spread your cheeks, cough!
←Rate | 11-24-2010 08:00 Comments (0)  




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