Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5394 of 6373
There are more men than women in mental hospitals... which just goes to show who's driving whom crazy.
TSA new tagline: We handle more packages than UPS!
←Rate |
11-23-2010 18:16
Comments (0)
TSA reports an huge increase in job applications submitted to the Miami office.
←Rate |
11-23-2010 18:09
Comments (0)
driving out to the family farm for Thanksgiving. But first, a stop at the airport for a quickie.
←Rate |
11-23-2010 17:58
Comments (0)
Wanna play airport?
←Rate |
11-23-2010 17:50
Comments (0)
GLORY HOLE (post on your buddy's wall)
←Rate |
11-23-2010 17:32
Comments (0)
crashing your family dinner on Thursday and bringing along a keg, dancers, a donkey and Cool Whip for the pie!
←Rate |
11-23-2010 17:28
Comments (0)
believes they should change the "maybe" response to event invitations to "yep, unless I get a better offer before then".
←Rate |
11-23-2010 17:16
Comments (0)
Dear God, I know you wouldn't give me anything I couldn't handle, but right now, I wish you didn't trust me so much...
←Rate |
11-23-2010 17:10
Comments (0)
TSA: Touching, Squeezing, Arresting...
←Rate |
11-23-2010 16:31
Comments (0)
having a bad day. the sidewalk tripped me, the wall ran into me and I got hit by a parked car. could my day get any worse? :)
←Rate |
11-23-2010 16:31
Comments (0)
@ TSA: Can't see London, can't see France, unless we see your underpants. Grope discounts available.
←Rate |
11-23-2010 16:30
Comments (0)
Does the Advance Pat Down come with an happy ending?
←Rate |
11-23-2010 16:17
Comments (0)
Goodbye mistletoe belt bucket....hello mistletoe boxer shorts.
←Rate |
11-23-2010 15:56
Comments (0)
"Real, Recognize Real, And I Can't See Or Hear None Of Yall." -Helen Keller
←Rate |
11-23-2010 15:52
Comments (0)
my girlfriend asked me what I wanted for my birthday. I replied "space". Was that wrong?
←Rate |
11-23-2010 14:40
Comments (0)
decided to burn lots of calories today.....so I set a fat kid on fire. :)
←Rate |
11-23-2010 14:31
Comments (0)
Bucket list #17 - boxing a kangaroo.
Facebook needs to add a maybe button for friend requests, some people deserve to wait for a decision to be made.
Dogs may have an incredible sense of smell, but they have a terrible sense of whether that smell is good or bad.