Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I've been waiting 2 hours for an employee to come and wash my hands like the sign says….
←Rate | 02-08-2011 15:14 by Rashad Hammoud Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys, it's time to start working on those apologies for Valentine's Day.
←Rate | 02-08-2011 15:13 by Rashad Hammoud Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I die...the one thing I hope God says to me when I get to heaven......"Don't worry.....she's not coming".
←Rate | 02-08-2011 14:07 by gygi Comments (0)  


   messageicon too avoid mistakes and regrets, always consult your wife before engaging in a flirtation.
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:38 by Prince Shawn Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why does a man take it for granted that a girl who flirts with him wants him to kiss her - when, nine times out of ten, she only wants him to want to kiss her?
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:37 by Prince Shawn Comments (0)  


   messageicon found out this morning that frying bacon while naked may not be as good of an idea as it sounds!
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:34 by Prince Shawn Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love puts the fun in together, the sad in apart, and the joy in a heart
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:33 by Prince Shawn Comments (0)  


   messageicon can't seem to find East Virgina on any of the maps he is looking at
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:33 by Prince Shawn Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonders how different the world would be if bad and stupid people came with warning labels
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:32 by Prince Shawn Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men regret the girls they didn't sleep with while Women regret the guys they did.
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:31 by Shawn Comments (0)  


   messageicon asked to leave from a house party for being to rowdy. Solution.....I asked to use the bathroom and upperdecked their toilet.
←Rate | 02-08-2011 13:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon just finished taking care of my bills...its easy when they are paperless, just hit delete
←Rate | 02-08-2011 12:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If it's your birthday in November, then you know your parents really enjoyed Valentine's Day...
←Rate | 02-08-2011 12:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon • Thank you Facebook for reconnecting me with the people I ignored in High School
←Rate | 02-08-2011 12:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The NFL should have had Justin Bieber sing the National Anthem. What would be more un-american than Christina Aquilera forgetting the lyrics? A Canadian singing our National Anthem. (p.s. the camera still adds 40 pounds even if you are wearing black)
←Rate | 02-08-2011 12:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met by your girlfriend with a broom, and having the Guts to ask: 'Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'
←Rate | 02-08-2011 11:47 by SEAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't you just love it when someone owes you money and posts that they just bought some luxury item for themselves.
←Rate | 02-08-2011 11:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 34 days till steak and rh day! :D
←Rate | 02-08-2011 11:34 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon February is National Chocolate Lovers Month, it's also Black History Month... coincidence?
←Rate | 02-08-2011 10:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today's Forecast: Mostly Grumpy with a 60% chance of Grouchy. High of Mean/Low of Nasty. A Temper Tantrum warning is in effect. Take immediate shelter!
←Rate | 02-08-2011 10:41 Comments (0)  




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