Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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Happy "Romantically Challenged" Day.

on this Valentine's Day...Please don't make me choose between you and porn...
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02-14-2011 12:47
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do you th ink its odd for a guy to send a girl digital flowers?
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02-14-2011 12:47
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Rj is wondering...Where is Cupid's evil step brother Stupid?? who uses alcohol instead of arrows And causes one night stands?
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02-14-2011 12:46
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After an evening of being snubbed at the Grammys, Justin Bieber reportedly spent the entire day in his Snuggie, crying into a pint of Ben and Jerry's. Humilated, Bieber was quoted as saying "I regret the day I was ever hatched"
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02-14-2011 12:22
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R lass said she dint want much for valentines day, she just wanted some chocolates and a few little surprises. She wasnt that impressed when I turned up with 3 kinder eggs! :-/
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02-14-2011 12:22 by P666rky
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Valentine's Day : Because love isn't quite complicated enough as it is....
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02-14-2011 12:08
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Facebook keeps showing me my ex "people you may know" Yes, FB, "People I wish I didn't know" quit taunting me on Vday!

What makes the Superbowl half time show better than the Grammys? The Superbowl half-time show was only 1/2 hour.

Girls gain weight because their brains can't hold all the info so it spreads to other places. Therefore she's not fat, she's a genius.

To all the women I have slept with, I have herpes....and you thought I'd forget you on Valentine's Day
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02-14-2011 11:15 by Derek
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Happy Mushy-Card-Nasty-Candy-in-a-Heart-Shaped-Box-Big-Balloon-That-Barely-Fits-in-Your-Car-And-You-Can't-See-to-Back-Up-$75-Rose s-That-Can-be-Bought-Tomorrow-for-$20-but-Must-be-Sent-to-"Prove"-Your-Love-Stand-In-Line-for-Two-Hours-to-Eat Day. <HATE
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02-14-2011 10:47
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Chocolate..✔,.Strawberries..✔,.Whipped Cream..✔,....now just need my Valentine!!
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02-14-2011 10:35 by BFF
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I wonder if Hugh Hefners new fiancé bought him a bag of prunes and a wheel chair for Valentine's day?
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02-14-2011 09:37 by SEAN
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Today is national VD awareness day, please wish all of your single friends a warm and happy VD.
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02-14-2011 09:27 by SEAN
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She said all she wanted for valentines day was a little kiss, man is she going to be shocked when she sees the midget drinking Dr. Deeper in our living room!!!
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02-14-2011 09:21 by Josh
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I remember when a MIX tape off the radio (while the DJ wasn't talking) was the best Valentine EVER!!
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02-14-2011 09:17 by A.Hess
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take today to remember those that died in the St. Valentine's Day Massacre in 1929.
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02-14-2011 09:11 by Judge Coe
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afraid to cook and eat eggs now. What if Lady Gaga is in one of them? She might get upset and beat me up.

I have a heart on...you know, so nobody tries to pinch me today...
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02-14-2011 09:00 by M.A.C.
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