Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon 50 Cent OR Floyd Mayweather Jnr - Let see which side Justin Beaver will choose
←Rate | 08-30-2014 01:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dating site for overweight people: All you can meet.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 22:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon McDonald's is changing their slogan form "We made it yesterday" to "Old, Cold, and Sold to you".
←Rate | 08-29-2014 20:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon GOOD NEWS EVERYONE,,, Comedy Central has just secured the rights to show all of the NY JETS regular season.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 19:14 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I may be married to the sea, but I'm seeing 2 of the Great Lakes on the side,,, Yeah,, it's Erie how Superior they are.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 18:17 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet Hell has the same toilet paper as airports.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 17:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fear does not prevent death. It prevents life
←Rate | 08-29-2014 16:34 by RJB224 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wedding cake…One last reminder of what it was like to shove something in her mouth.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 16:08 by Nipper Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm in it for the long run, as long as running isn't involved.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 15:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Michael Jackson could do a very realistic Thriller video right now.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 15:11 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Relationship Status: After carefully weighing the options. Willing to give loneliness a try.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 15:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some psychologists say that sleeping naked can help boost a person's confidence, but nobody in this park seems to appreciate it.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 14:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Ladies We also have bouncy body parts, but you don't see us inserting wire into our underwear to keep them in place. Let em jiggle!
←Rate | 08-29-2014 14:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "What's in the box... WHAT'S IN THE BOX??!!!" Brad Pitt opening his wedding gifts.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 13:45 by Grabman Comments (0)  


   messageicon I remember my first beer.....Ah, who I am kidding....I was too drunk to remember. Plus I was like 12 so...
←Rate | 08-29-2014 11:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon i am now doing my bucket list,until I kick the bucket challenge.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 09:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon After getting an astronomical quote from my mechanic, I am going to try the ABS challenge. That's where I drive my car without anti lock breaks, until someone donates for me to get it fixed!
←Rate | 08-29-2014 02:51 by Brodieking Comments (0)  


   messageicon Forgive them father for they are not civilized or educated.
←Rate | 08-29-2014 00:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Seriously, if someone else had been shot in Ferguson, you know Michael Brown would've been one of the looters.
←Rate | 08-28-2014 23:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Boy the way Led Zeppelin played, songs that debuted on MTVeeem, guys like us were getting laid. . . those were the days. . .
←Rate | 08-28-2014 23:08 by JAB Comments (1)  




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