friday OR weekend Funny Status Messages

   All my updates this past weekend were super updates. I'm back to my regular updates now...

   Me Monday ƪ(´~`")∫ Tuesday (-____-)"" Wednesday (⌣́_⌣̀) Thursday Ҩ( > ̯ < )Ҩ Friday (ˆ⌣ˆ)ง Saturday ~('▽'~) (~'▽')~ Sunday (˘ʃ_ƪ˘)

   "Yesterdays history, tomorrows a mystery, and today is Friday"

   "Knock knock", "who's there?", "Weekend", "Weekend who?", "We can wish it was the weekend, but its MOnday!"

   Just been watching Ladies Beach volleyball and there's already been a wrist injury...but I should be ok by friday;)

   I bet Jesus was pissed that he missed the whole weekend and then woke up on a Sunday when the liquor stores are closed.

   It's Friday! The only two who aren't excited about that are my bank account and my liver.

   Goodbye Memorial Day weekend. Like a fifth of Vodka and a handful of prescription painkillers you made Monday more bearable......

   Please drink responsibly this weekend and don't drink and dri......Wait this is Facebook, most of you probably won't leave the house! ... Good talk!

   According to Facebook, some people I don't remember are grilling this weekend.

   If 40 is the new 30, then Monday is the new Friday.

   completely worn out after spending the whole weekend at a genital jamboree.

   A rainy Friday is still better than a sunny Monday...

   I hate it when me and my subconscious is having a heated debate...and just when I come up with good comebacks, it thinks up a even better one! I thought about drinking on Friday, subconscious said "how about now!".... good one!

   Thursday: Friday's younger, yet equally attractive sister

   Fatass Quanicka ruined Casual Friday for every this past Friday......Sh e wore shorts

   It's Friday for me and Monday for my liver.

   Every weekend I participate in a liquid cleanse diet... with beer.

   Friday Night Pick Up Line: Either stop being so attractive or make out with me, it is your choice.

   I know every day is a gift, but where's the receipt for Mondays? I want to exchange it for another Friday.