Monday Funny Status Messages

   Why is that the world is always going to end on a weekend? Why not Monday morning, ideally before I have to get up and go to work?

   I think I'm going to call in raptured to work on monday

   Not looking forward to the end of the world sat..should be on a monday..

   I like to spend my Monday mornings avoiding people who might ask about my weekend.

   Monday is like a midget at a urinal...You have to be on your toes!!

   Why is Monday so far away from Friday but Friday is so close to Monday?

   Today the rest of you women don't matter til' Monday...and when Tuesday rolls around a couple of you still won't matter.

   Monday is the strongest day of all the weekdays, even though it is cursed by every other person in this world, it still exists

   Shouln't the Monday after Easter Sunday be known as Egg Salad Monday?

   It would have been a more believable story if Jesus had died on a Monday and then rose again on a Saturday, just like I do every week.

   Monday sure is an awful way to spend 1/7th of our life......

   Dear Monday, Please don't be a snatch today. Please pass on the message to the rest of the week...Thanks

   Rain on a Monday, in spite of the fact we need the rain, is unacceptable. Mother Nature will be hearing from my attorney.

   If Monday had a face, I'd punch it.

   My April Fools' Day prank at airport security did not go well. You may not see me Monday.

   if you listen very carefully you can hear Monday sharpen her claws in the distance

   plan for the day. 1. get off work and drink till Monday. 2.figure the rest out later

   I hate it when Pi Day falls on a Monday!

   Snooki is going to be hosting WWE raw on monday. Finally, a good match for Hornswoggle

   I had my dose of monday Tiger Blood, but I broke my freaking dragon tooth.