life Funny Status Messages

   Wonder if all the fake Facebooker's will be real on Halloween and tell us how their life is really going??

   Love is just a chapter in a guy`s life.. But to girls ? It's the whole book.

   One day, your life will flash b4 your eyes. Make sure its worth watching.

   The only thing I can truly count on in life is a calculator.

   I always wonder what things went horribly wrong in someone's life that led them to buy a hotdog at 7-11.

   For Halloween I'm going to write "Life" on a plain white T-shirt and hand out lemons to strangers

   My life will not be complete until I've walked away from an explosion in slow motion

   Admit it, at one time in your life you went a public washroom and didnt wash your hands after because nobody else would see you

   At one point in their life, 90% of all women will have intelligent DNA, unfortunately most will spit it out!

   There is always this person on Facebook who thinks he/she can teach you the meaning of life in a two sentence status and you're like'Deep, real deep''.

   my life's story is too far different from yours so please stop questioning and judging me

   I was told to get a life so Up Up, Down Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start now I have 30 of them!

   When things don't add up in your life, start subtracting.

   Am I the only one who has their life flash before their eyes when they sit on a cold toilet seat

   If you keep walking backwards, you will eventually fall over the hurdles you have already crossed in your life.

   according to statistics you waste 5 years of your life looking at facebook!!

   I want to live my life like a fly, pester as many people and get into as much sh!t as possible before I die.

   If life is a highway, that totally explains my inability to merge on to it.

   In life it doesn't matter what people say about you... Most of them f##kers dont even know the real you, so who gives a toss what a bunch of sad twisted plebs think... The people who love and respect you the most know the person you really are.

   Don't take what life gives you and frown, take what life gives you and smile because you know you can make the best of it.