Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 867 of 6446

I think my cat wanna play hide n seek, thing is I always win when I shake a bag of cat food
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10-18-2010 19:24 by @jewelle3
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It is always seems to be "Enter some random family member" week or another. Who the hell makes up this schedule and where is it posted? I'm starting to think this crap is just made up.
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10-18-2010 20:13 by bigedusw
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This halloween I decided to dress up as the Liberty Bell. If we end up at the same party, be sure to come over and check out my enormous crack.
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10-18-2010 20:45 by johne
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thinks more people would take Sara Palin seriously if she lowered the tonal quality of her voice. Ow, my freakin' ears!!
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10-18-2010 21:28
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Sasquatch is messin with me.
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10-18-2010 21:36 by Imho
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Whew, I wasn't aware pumpkin carving was that much work. Whatever happened to a couple eyes, a nose and a mouth?
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10-18-2010 21:37 by Jeff
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Brock Lesnar will kick Cain Velasquez ass!!!
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10-18-2010 21:49
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Parent:What does 'WTF' mean?! Kid:ummm...welcome to facebook!
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10-18-2010 22:06
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NFL Update: Favre Reports Stiffness.
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10-18-2010 22:54 by jdpower
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This just in......Deanna Farve, wife of Brett Farve, has issued a statement saying that the cell phone pics weren't meant for Jenn Sterger but they were meant to be sent to her. She was quoted as saying, "They were supposed to be sent to me but you know B
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10-18-2010 23:09
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I guess yankee fans wont update there statuss!!
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10-18-2010 23:44 by SAMIR K
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hopes this Halloween, he doesn't end up with a bag full of restraining orders again.
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10-19-2010 00:04
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What did the blonde say when the airplane began to shake? “Must be an earthquake.”
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10-19-2010 00:11 by BEGO
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The Killer in me is the Killer in you.
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10-19-2010 00:38 by BEGO
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Skipping the new "Jackass" movie... already saw Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar on "The View" this week.
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10-19-2010 00:40 by Billy
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Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.
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10-19-2010 01:58
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Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
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10-19-2010 01:59 by PL
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My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
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10-19-2010 02:01 by PL
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Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
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10-19-2010 02:02 by PL
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If you go to sleep with a itching ass you will wake up with a stinking finger ...
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10-19-2010 02:05 by PL
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