love Funny Status Messages

   I would love to agree with you, but there is no point in both of us being wrong.

   Love doesn't need to be perfect, it just needs to be true.

   I love cooking for my man because it makes me feel both independent and oppressed at the same time.

   Sex might satisfy, food might fuel, love might sustain, but without booze, what is the point?

   Was it wrong to wear a "I love happy endings" t-shirt to massage envy?

   11 year olds today: "Omg I love smokin pot. I get like so drunk. Yolo!" Me when I was 11: "I can't wait to go home and play Club Penguin!

   "SWAG" LOL....I love to know where words originate from and in the 1960's a group of men came up with the term "SWAG"....it's meaning Secretly We Are G@y!! True story!! So go get your SWAG on and please post on FB everytime you do so I can laugh at you!!

   "I love it when you rub your happiness in my face & facebook" said no one ever.

   When I say I love you, I do it with the same amount of sincerity with which a celebrity claims he loves all his fans. Zero.

   There's no worse feeling than lying next to the person you love and they don't know you love them. Or that you're in their house again.

   All through their lives while raising my kids, I consistently told them that when they grow up they should “do what you love.” I probably should have also mentioned that they should run like hell as soon as they heard the sirens.

   If any woman says "I love you" to me for the first time, then I have the right to say "Do you have evidence to support that statement?"

   I swear ugly people find love faster.

   We only stalk the ones we love.

   "You love to laugh?? Wow, how unique!" said no one, ever...

   It is said that the first step to solving the problem of an addict!on is the verbal admission of the issue itself. Okay then: I love n@ked women.

   fall in love with a person for their brains and not their looks. Eh, save that sh!t for ugly people

   Love when people update their Facebook page 20+ times a day. Frickin annoying. We get it you are important!!

   Dance like nodody's watching, love like no one can give the authorities a helpful description, stalk like there's no restraining order.

   Might love you quicker if you bring me more Liquor.