Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 328 of 6399
Time for spring break!! *̡͌l̡*͡͡͡ ͡I _ ͇๐ےﮯ̡ *
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03-29-2010 10:40
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dont forget to turn your clocks back this weekend, i'm turning mine back to 1970 when we had no illegal immigrants
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03-29-2010 10:40
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║▌║█║▌║▌││║▌║█║▌│║▌║█║▌║▌││║▌║ *ZAP* *BEEP* Price: $7.95
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03-29-2010 10:41
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((̲̅ ̲̅(̲̅C̲̅r̲̅a̲̅y̲̅o̲̅l̲̲̅̅a̲̅( ̲̅̅((>
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03-29-2010 10:41
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thinks it was irresponsible for the Cox Candy Company to make a lollipop. Who would walk into a candy store and ask for a Cox Sucker?
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03-29-2010 10:46 by Leeferd
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٩(•̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶ ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶ YIPPEE!!
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03-29-2010 10:47
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Have you ever been on an elevator talking to someone (about nothing top secret really) and when anyone else walks in; everyone shuts up? Such a strange phenomenon...
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03-29-2010 12:14 by KG
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-- I come from a long line of Conga dancers.....
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03-29-2010 12:17 by Y.P
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i walked in to my local hardware store after work a member of staff asked if I wanted decking, I quickly got the first punch in before he had chance
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03-29-2010 13:09
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Have you ever said goodbye to someone before a long trip or even to leave somewhere for good, but you end up having to come back moments later for something you forgot? Does it make the original goodbye lose all of its sentimental value? Just wondering...
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03-29-2010 13:34 by KG
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Jewish fun fact: If you celebrate Passover on top of an overpass, you go back in time
LIE: A very poor substitute for the truth, but the only one discovered to date.
Bananosecond, n.; Time elapsed between slipping on the peel and hitting the pavement.
if you were a status....i`d like u.....!!!!!
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03-29-2010 16:22 by siddharth
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Warning. Going to sleep on Sunday will cause Monday. Please note that staying awake all night does not prevent Monday. There is no cure.
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03-29-2010 16:28
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if you need a friend (text me) need a laugh (call me) need a hug (stop by) need money (this number is no longer in service)
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03-29-2010 16:29
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Life is like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today,may burn your a*s tomorrow.
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03-29-2010 17:19
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for people who think an invisible object cant kill you try hitting and invisible block on mario bros
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03-29-2010 18:45
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One of these days I'm going to run in to this Murphy dude who insists on making these messed up laws... and he's going to get knocked the F out!!!!
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03-29-2010 18:59 by Steve
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Just had a friend post "Awesome day, Dry spell broken." and his MOM clicked the like button and he responds "MOM! WTH?" and then she asks "oops how do I UNclick it?" HAHAHA!!
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03-29-2010 19:07 by KG
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