Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5429 of 6385
How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
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11-17-2010 05:50
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How can there be self-help “groups”?
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11-17-2010 05:48
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If my mind can conceive it, and my heart can believe it, I know I can achieve it.
I want to make you feel like your the only girl in the world LOL jks I got ho's, in different area codes!!
hopes Prince Harry doesn't wear one of his special party costumes to his brother's nuptuals.
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11-17-2010 02:56
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Thursday is on my mind Facebook!! Now stop asking me that and go bug someone else!!!
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11-17-2010 02:42
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On a scale of 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10 how OCD are you?
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11-17-2010 01:55
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Dear Santa.... All I want is access to that "bad boy's" list of yours.
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11-17-2010 01:35
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Today is National Facebook Unfriend Day. I hope you make it to tomorrow as my friend. I just want you to know I'm pulling for you.
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11-17-2010 00:29 by The FRED
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Forget scholarships and honor societies - the highest academic complement is getting an awesome grade on a paper you half-assed at four in the morning the day it was due.
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11-17-2010 00:04
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won't just hit the spot. He will kill the spot & dress inappropriately at the spots funeral.
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11-16-2010 23:31
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has a new slogan for TSA: Can't see London, can't see France, unless we see your underpants!!!
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11-16-2010 23:21 by DAYAM
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Been thinking of things I could do today, leaning towards going to Victoria's Secret and looking around.
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11-16-2010 23:09
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A grown man making snow angels in the yard shouldn't be so strange...dressed in a clown suit playing the bagpipes sure as hell made it weird.
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11-16-2010 23:01
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She goes down more than a submarine commander.
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11-16-2010 22:53
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Q: Are you tired of this sillyass Q & A game everyone is doing? A: Yes I wish that they would $hit and fall back in it.
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11-16-2010 22:14 by Kods
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My husband asked me if I wanted to play Call of Duty the other day. When I said yes, he handed me a tub of cleaning supplies.
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11-16-2010 21:38
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Trail mix should just sell M&M's
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11-16-2010 21:36
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I have to say here lately i've been very surprised that after clicking spell check I have no spelling errors...
I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-gf and me. After all, I'm a Gemini and she's a b*tch.