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Snotty Funny Status Messages
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Page: 8 of 22
Hey person calling from a blocked number, I'm not answering...... Ever.
39
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03-30-2013 11:56 by
snotty
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0
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BREAKING NEWS: Baby found in the middle of the Meteorite crash site,,, he is miraculously unharmed... Wrapped in what seems to be a red cape.
128
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02-16-2013 06:37 by
snotty
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I know it's 3 meals a day,,,,,, But how many at night?
128
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04-06-2012 18:04 by
snotty
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0
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Next time someone presses the elevator button you've already pressed,,, act totally impressed & tell them they did it waaaay better than you.
89
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04-08-2012 08:31 by
snotty
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0
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If I was single, I would have a stick figure of myself on the back of my car next to a bag of cash.
89
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05-28-2012 08:47 by
snotty
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0
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I have a theory that the world will end in 5105, and we've been reading the Mayan calendar upside down
100
18
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01-11-2012 18:04 by
snotty
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2
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I guess I prefer Subway because they make me feel like I'm making the healthy decision when I order a loaf of bread with 18 meatballs on it.
100
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03-21-2012 18:15 by
snotty
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1
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My neighbor is the CEO of a factory that makes annoying children
100
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03-30-2012 11:23 by
snotty
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0
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Hello and welcome to DeVry orientation.. Sign-in sheets are on the left, Steve is passing out your diplomas,,, thanks & congrats class of 10:47.
50
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02-02-2014 07:57 by
snotty
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0
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I got my killer quads from hovering over public toilets.
50
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10-19-2014 18:57 by
snotty
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0
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Eggnog is perfect for when you feel like drinking a glass of pancake batter.
50
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11-23-2014 18:41 by
snotty
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0
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My favourite part of driving through my state,, is the four-mile stretch of highway that isn’t under construction.
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04-15-2015 15:36 by
snotty
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0
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I just found out that his full name is actually,, Vehicle Identification Number Diesel.
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09-21-2013 12:48 by
snotty
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I LOVE sleeping,,,,,, It's like being dead,,, Without all the commitment
161
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01-07-2012 13:35 by
snotty
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My driver's side window stopped working,,,, So yeah,, I'm probably gonna starve to death..
111
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08-11-2012 11:11 by
snotty
Comments (
5
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My mother-in-law's coming,,,,, I had to clear out half my closet so she has a place to hang upside down and sleep
194
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08-09-2012 18:24 by
snotty
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0
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I guess you could call her a trophy wife. She’s tattooed with the names of the previous winners.
61
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03-12-2014 19:56 by
snotty
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0
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Just called the bank for my account info,, and a voice whispered 'If you break the pack in half, Ramen noodles can last you two days.'
61
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05-14-2015 18:18 by
snotty
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0
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Wanted: Someone to hand feed me Doritos so my fingers don't get orange..... P.S. No weirdos.
61
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04-16-2016 08:19 by
Snotty
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0
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Awww.... It looks like the neighbors are having the police dept over for brunch..
61
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04-24-2012 01:01 by
snotty
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