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   messageicon all I know is that before I watched Miley Cyrus' performance at the VMA's, it didn't burn when I peed.
←Rate | 08-26-2013 10:13 by Michael Comments (0)  


   messageicon Miley's a$$ is so flat it looks like a backwards cameltoe!!
←Rate | 08-26-2013 10:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Taylor Swift seems like the kinda girl who would put her stuffed animals in another room when she has sex.
←Rate | 09-08-2013 08:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never met a teenager driving a luxury car that I didn't hate.
←Rate | 07-28-2012 11:12 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hope Adele and Eminem never date, can you imagine what their breakup albums would be like!
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:38 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bought one of those tennis racket looking bug zappers today. My god, where have you been all my life. What fun! Oooh, here comes the dog....
←Rate | 08-02-2012 14:20 by Daveb1191 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I could probably beat Usain Bolt if we were both trying to get the last ice cream sandwich.
←Rate | 08-09-2012 09:53 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hating people takes too much energy. I just pretend they're dead.
←Rate | 08-12-2012 16:25 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm so hungry I could drink 5 more beers.
←Rate | 08-14-2012 19:35 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm single by choice. Not MY choice. But it's still a choice
←Rate | 08-21-2012 12:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can stop lifting weights now; it's actually your personality that nobody likes.
←Rate | 08-27-2012 00:17 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon if Da Vinci were alive today, the "Mona Lisa" would have been called "IMG-20125215-00854.jpg"
←Rate | 01-11-2013 12:23 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon If anything the Lance Armstrong confession confirms my belief that exercise leads to deceitful behavior.
←Rate | 01-15-2013 06:43 by sully Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wouldn't it be great to hear a priest say "been there, done that" in reply to your confessed sins?
←Rate | 01-15-2013 21:17 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys, if you are ever watching 'Indecent Proposal' and your wife or girlfriend asks: "Would you let someone sleep with me for $1,000,000?" Just lie!!
←Rate | 01-18-2013 19:04 by urboyblue Comments (0)  


   messageicon Understanding women is easy, too: Just take calculus, multiply by quantum physics, then divide by E=mc². Also, hold them when they cry. Boom.
←Rate | 01-19-2013 12:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've tried everything to get to sleep. Well, except that thing where you shut off your phone and close your eyes, but let's not get crazy.
←Rate | 01-19-2013 13:26 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon the NFL aka No F***in Lights."
←Rate | 02-03-2013 20:49 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a question. How is it that the man who wasn't good enough to wed your daughter, can somehow be the father of the smartest grandchildren in the world?
←Rate | 02-08-2013 08:08 by MTQ Comments (0)  


   messageicon We all have that place we go to that is full of negatives and disappointment. Mine sadly is my checkbook.
←Rate | 09-14-2012 13:32 Comments (0)  



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