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Decided to put up a Christmas tree this year....wrestled with it a bit..finally got in in place... it smells like Christmas now.. and it looks so cool, hanging from my car's rearview mirror :)
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12-09-2010 19:04 by
franknsign
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Please give your Mother's an Extra Big Hug tomorrow for those who can no longer hug theirs here on earth... Cherish the Moment.
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05-08-2010 19:26 by
justme
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I'm perfecting a new perfume called "Forever Alone".... It smells like Lean Cuisines and cats.
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10-25-2012 18:29 by
snotty
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The 4 Stages of Going Out Drinking: 1. Why do I do this to myself 2. This isn't so bad 3. WE SHOULD DO THIS MORE OFTEN 4. Why do I do this to myself
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11-09-2012 22:39 by
BEGO
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Can they make band aids that are easier and faster to unpack so I don't bleed to death?
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12-15-2012 02:05 by
oregon
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Every so often, I try to fornicate a large word into conversation,, even if I'm not sure what it means
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07-17-2012 07:42 by
snotty
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If I'm ever in jail my one call is going to be to the Kool Aid guy.
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07-31-2012 17:14 by
Marshall the Great
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If you think the world is getting more unsafe, violent and unpredictable, the 13th century would like a word with you.
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08-03-2013 11:42
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I was hoping Apple would replace Siri with Morgan Freeman on the iPhone 5
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09-12-2012 21:37 by
BEGO
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If you can't use your turn signals, you should not be trusted with the rest of the car either.
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09-22-2012 11:35 by
Daheavy1
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I swear the question "what do you want to eat?" Leads to more fights then any other phrase..
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10-04-2012 22:12
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If someone won't lift a finger to call you, see you or spend time with you then it's time for you to lift five fingers and wave goodbye
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12-19-2012 16:35 by
Jackoo
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When I wake up before my alarm clock...I sometimes sneak up on it while it's still sleeping and yell "HOW DOES IT FEEL B*TCH"
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12-25-2012 23:17
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Facebook is not all about likes and shares. . . Like and share if you agree.
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01-04-2013 21:28 by
BEGO
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if your FB name includes your college degree initials, you are a douche...
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01-11-2013 13:33
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Masturbation is great. It wakes you up, puts you to sleep, relieves stress, and the only person who judges if you're good at it is yourself
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01-16-2013 16:40 by
Jackoo
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My boss asked me today which one of us was the stupid one. I told him everyone knows that you dont hire stupid people.
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01-18-2013 05:00 by
equaloppjoker
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Lets all take a minute and realize the lack of creativity in the name "fire place"
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01-23-2013 23:26
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Turbo tax might just be the worst video game I ever played.
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02-04-2013 23:04 by
minnie haha
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Love doesn’t walk away, people do.
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04-26-2013 21:31 by
BEGO
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