Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Funny Status Messages
|
Recent Comments
|
Submit a Status Message
Funny Status Messages
View All Funny Status Messages
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Trump Filter:
ON
|
OFF
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
449
450
451
452
453
454
455
456
Next»
Most Recent
Page: 453 of 5577
Remember the bridge you drive over today was built by the lowest bidder.
100
18
←Rate |
01-15-2011 03:35
Comments (
0
)
I took this personality test on the internet, and it said... "Describe yourself in one word." I answered, "Not good at following instructions."
100
18
←Rate |
07-21-2010 21:20 by
Marshall the Great
Comments (
0
)
When sitting directly across from someone also using a laptop, I can't stop myself from telling them, "you sunk my battleship!"
100
18
←Rate |
08-03-2010 13:51
Comments (
0
)
I'd like to be so rich that my dog has a dog.
100
18
←Rate |
08-08-2010 02:22
Comments (
0
)
has no doubt that there's a place in every woman's life for a red thong, but that place is not five inches above the waistline of her jeans. Ever.
100
18
←Rate |
11-13-2010 08:56 by
ci
Comments (
0
)
Hiding peoples status' on your news feed is the best way of sayin f*ck you're annoying but I don't wanna delete you cuz you'll notice.
100
18
←Rate |
05-17-2010 10:00 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
What do I do when I see someone EXTREMELY GOOD LOOKIN'? I stare, I smile, and when I get tired, I put the mirror down!
100
18
←Rate |
05-18-2010 17:37 by
Marshall the Great
Comments (
0
)
Telling the cop that you thought the voice in your GPS counted as a designated driver doesn't help your case.
100
18
←Rate |
08-27-2010 08:36 by
MBH
Comments (
0
)
I really wish sleep came in roll-over minutes.
100
18
←Rate |
09-20-2010 15:33
Comments (
0
)
Got out of jury duty by prefacing every answer with "according to the prophecy"
100
18
←Rate |
06-29-2009 19:28 by
ritchie_bonk
Comments (
0
)
loves when people say "I tell it like it is." Really? How about you tell it like it isn't just to shake things up a bit?
50
9
←Rate |
11-18-2009 14:27
Comments (
0
)
Did you ever notice that all lesbians look like Justin Bieber?
50
9
←Rate |
06-27-2010 11:13 by
Jeff W
Comments (
0
)
whenever you don't feel special or the world is draggin you down. just remember this.. there's always beer."
50
9
←Rate |
07-01-2010 14:10 by
Dylan Bosch
Comments (
0
)
beer doesn't make me post better Facebook Status updates, it just makes me not care what you think of them.
50
9
←Rate |
07-06-2010 17:22 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
i suppose those highway signs that read "Speed enforced by aircraft" has a more serious meaning in Iraq.
50
9
←Rate |
07-15-2010 17:13 by
levon
Comments (
0
)
wonders how people who work in BubbleWrap factories get ANY work done at all.
50
9
←Rate |
07-30-2010 11:28
Comments (
0
)
Remember before they had Hummers when you had to actually talk to a guy to tell if he was an a**hole?
50
9
←Rate |
08-14-2010 18:59
Comments (
0
)
figured out when ordering at Starbucks, it pretty much works out to $1 a word
50
9
←Rate |
08-19-2010 13:49
Comments (
0
)
One of the biggest benchmarks of true adulthood is when you come to the realization that all teenagers are douche bags.
50
9
←Rate |
08-20-2010 09:04
Comments (
0
)
What doesn't kill you makes you slower. -Ancient Zombie Wisdom
50
9
←Rate |
08-24-2010 06:22
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
449
450
451
452
453
454
455
456
Next»
Most Recent
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com