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12-10-2010 11:10 by @Jimboleem
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The next time someone calls you from a withheld number just answer it and say, "hello London sperm bank. You squeeze it - we freeze it!" ... See what happens.
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09-02-2010 09:34 by @clarkysj
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Jogging is too much work, walking is too slow, I'm gonna take up skipping. When people see me coming down the sidewalk, I'm pretty sure they'll make an extra effort to move out of the way.
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06-15-2009 20:57 by The FRED
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Round-trip airfare from San Diego to Minneapolis - $335; checking a suitcase - $25; Dr. Pepper & Peanuts - $6.50; WiFi - now free; Checking your Facebook page and over-shooting the airport by 150 miles instead of landing the jet airliner - JOBLESS !!!