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a coincidence is only a coincidence if you don't have an open mind 
When I am king, you will be first against the wall, With your opinion which is of no consequence at all.
thinks Larry King has used up 8 of his 9 wives....
If women did not exist, all of the money in the world would have no meaning.
I'm pretty damn sure me wife is in the 33% of the married women who claim their pets are better listeners than their husbands - last night I saw the cat desparately going through my draw, may be trying to find my noise cancellation headphones !!!
Richard Blumenthal clarifies - he served at 'Vie et Nam' a restaurant in Greenwich
I wonder if cows refer to their sons as cowboys.
I took my dog for a walk and played Frisbee with him, but he was useless. I really need to get a flatter dog.
more people should be less like most people.
I am not a control freak. I prefer the term "predictability enthusiast".
Since Facebook came into my life I have completely neglected MySpace. This must be what parents feel like when they have a second child.
Why is it one you always wish for is out there somewhere...just waiting for the right time for you both to meet..and it will happen when you least expect it... :)
"Maybe later..." is a polite way of saying "Never"
you know you are on facebook too much if there are no new status message since the last time you logged in..and you have over 700 friends
If you are never scared, embarrassed or hurt, it means you never take chances.
I'm dving behind someone who is obviously scared of his gas pedal.
My neighbor pays for the premium channels.
I'm so happy Facebook wasn't around when I was in high school.
Just found out that I've been on double secret probation for quite sometime now.
If Gluttony really is a sin, according to a recent poll, 67% of Americans are going straight to hell. 