Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon I wonder what a camel thinks of when he looks at his toe...
←Rate | 07-07-2010 20:32 by mark Comments (0)  


   messageicon Smog from wildfires are creating health concerns for resedents in Moscow. More importantly, it's making it difficult for Sarah Palin to see it from her house.
←Rate | 08-09-2010 21:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I'll text random numbers with things like "Have you ever taken a poop so good it gave you goosebumps?"
←Rate | 08-12-2010 08:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon - Q: What did King Kong say to Rosie O'Donnell? A: "Is it in?"
←Rate | 09-19-2010 03:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you need space then work at NASA.
←Rate | 03-05-2010 03:37 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon doesn't have a girlfriend, but he does know a woman who'd be mad at him for saying that.
←Rate | 03-10-2010 18:44 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Why does all the crime and unemployment target the blue states??
←Rate | 09-05-2017 08:44 Comments (3)  


   messageicon NFL= NOT FOR LONG
←Rate | 09-27-2017 15:50 Comments (1)  


   messageicon n't it odd that people will fight for toilet paper but not for their freedom?
←Rate | 12-22-2021 06:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't wait to embark on this wonderfully mysterious, enchantingly romantic journey with you. The entire trip. All the way from, "Hello".....to...... "WTF JUDGE! THE HOUSE, THE CAR, AND PERMANENT ALIMONY TOO????"
←Rate | 08-06-2011 15:21 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey east coast, California speaking. Hope you enjoyed our earthquakes:)
←Rate | 08-24-2011 02:02 by Fat Alec Comments (0)  


   messageicon I better get to sleep. I have to get up early to call in sick to work..
←Rate | 05-16-2011 21:15 by hovo Comments (0)  


   messageicon To all the women I've loved before, I have found someone better.
←Rate | 09-14-2011 14:34 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I use to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean
←Rate | 07-03-2014 00:16 by @RonnieChapman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Santa... In reguards to my wish list last year, I wrote to you asking, "sex, for a change" Not "for a sex change"... Please fix this
←Rate | 11-14-2013 08:03 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Imma let you finish, Lamar, but Whitney Houston had the best naked on cocaine death ever". - Kanye West
←Rate | 10-17-2015 07:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I find it quite ironic that the most dangerous thing about weed is getting caught with it.
←Rate | 03-02-2014 13:17 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon At my job I am forced to deal with more c unts than a gynecologist.
←Rate | 04-04-2014 10:45 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mother suggested that I get professional help... and that's when I hired my first hooker.
←Rate | 02-26-2014 08:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Well I don't want to date anyone that's ugly, but I also don't want to date anyone that's stupid. So I'm single.
←Rate | 02-27-2014 08:08 by Czovczov Comments (0)  



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