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   messageicon Romantic films are known to ruin relationships as they give unrealistic expectations to women about what to expect from men. Porn has the same effect on men.
←Rate | 12-27-2011 22:08 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon When someone looks over my shoulder while I'm on the computer, I open up a new tab and start searching, "HOW TO KILL THE PERSON BEHIND ME."
←Rate | 02-19-2013 06:14 by flinnie Comments (1)  


   messageicon So, Martin Luther King, Jr. had to wait 40 years to get his own momunent, and then they make it out of white marble? Awkward...
←Rate | 09-02-2011 21:36 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon I hated my first experience of skydiving. I jumped out of the plane with the other person next to me. Anyway about halfway down he said "So how long have you been an instructor?"
←Rate | 04-23-2011 13:48 by @clarkysj Comments (0)  


   messageicon The diamond company "Debeers" has had some pretty interesting slogans. One year it was "Diamonds, will take her breath away.", last year it was "Diamonds will render her speechless.". I think this year it should be, "Diamonds, that'll shut her up."
←Rate | 01-29-2010 15:02 by JeremyCakes Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men may have created fire but women have discovered the art of playing with it..
←Rate | 03-23-2010 12:18 by Samir Momin Comments (1)  


   messageicon People complain about auto-correct but it is helpful 99% of the titties.
←Rate | 03-26-2013 15:49 by @Georgesdiab Comments (0)  


   messageicon A cop stopped me and asked "Do you know why I followed you " so I said "because my tweets are funny" & we laughed & high-fived & I'm in Jail.....
←Rate | 01-12-2013 00:31 by @zubindalal1 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate it when couples have a little argument and the girlfriend changes her Facebook status to 'single'.I mean, I have arguments with my parents all the time, you don't see me changing my status to 'orphan'.
←Rate | 04-07-2012 07:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Back before Walmart, you used to have to buy a ticket to see a bearded woman.
←Rate | 02-28-2012 19:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon No updates this morning. Cant find anything worth stealing from anywhere...
←Rate | 12-26-2011 23:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon With everything going on lately... I've got a lot of serious thinking to do! Oops....Did I say "Thinking".... I meant "Drinking"!!
←Rate | 10-18-2011 18:17 by Dani Comments (0)  


   messageicon Me: You're the prettiest girl I've ever seen. Her: You just want to have sex with me. Me: And you're smart too, I like that.
←Rate | 10-22-2013 20:55 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon If we start calling it 'potato juice', Vodka becomes a health drink. RIGHT??
←Rate | 10-01-2012 05:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon received a call saying that my son had been lying in school, and was being expelled. I don't have a son. That kid is one damn good liar
←Rate | 11-14-2009 09:09 by deithy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I remember when downloading a song meant trying to tape it off the radio while hoping the DJ didn't talk over the song.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 17:17 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you like to make love while listening to music, always choose a live album. That way you'll get an applause every 3 to 4 minutes.
←Rate | 05-16-2011 14:10 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon who else wakes up in the morning and checks their Facebook like its the morning newspaper??
←Rate | 12-22-2010 15:30 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A Shout Out to all the beautiful women who don't need to dress half naked to get a man's attention. Stay classy! The rest of you, come with me.
←Rate | 12-11-2012 19:16 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kids these days are spoiled. Ipads, smart phones, video games, etc. But they'll never know the joy of putting an Ozzy Osborne cassette tape in a Teddy Ruxpin
←Rate | 10-06-2012 05:36 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  



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