Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I like you.You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
←Rate | 06-11-2011 06:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon i'm going to take a pic of my son and use age progression to see what he looks like at 16. I'll keep it in his room, and when he finally figures out its him, I'm gonna try and convince him he's a time traveler
←Rate | 06-11-2011 06:08 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon 6 family members had a birthday this month and thanks to Facebook I knew that this year.
←Rate | 06-11-2011 04:29 by Jackbrass Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just witnessed a grown man run down an escalator the wrong way. Most embarrassing thing...it was my dad
←Rate | 06-11-2011 04:20 by @qpid901 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The word 'Microsoft' makes me think of chubby midgets
←Rate | 06-10-2011 23:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When somebody sends me a 'k' text, I assume they forgot the rest of "fuc_ you" so I make sure to correct them.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 23:06 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon 3 things I've learned in school: Texting without looking, Sleeping without getting caught, TEAMWORK on tests
←Rate | 06-10-2011 23:05 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Loving someone who doesn't love you back is like hugging a cactus. The tighter you hold on, the more it hurts.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 23:03 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wish Adam would have spent more than just a rib.....
←Rate | 06-10-2011 23:02 by greg2missy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love seeing the Australian news cause it's like they're from the future.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:59 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today I told my car it's okay for it to tell me if it's a transformer. It didn't answer. I assume it's just waiting for the right moment.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:59 by greg2missy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd be a great sports announcer because I'm really good at pointing out obvious sh*t and having incomprehensible conversations.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:58 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd be a great sports announcer because I'm really good at pointing out obvious shit and having incomprehensible conversations.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:53 by Marshall the Great | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes people are beautiful. Not in looks. Not in what they say. Just in what they are.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:51 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon To the guy who named cotton candy: Yes! It looks just like it sounds. To the guy who named Milk Duds: What the hell is wrong with you?
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:50 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've been having this weird feeling all day, the only way I know how to describe it is: you know when you switch on a switch and nothing happens? That.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:49 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon They really need to add a “download this song illegally” button on Pandora.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:49 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon NOTICE: Helen Waite is now in charge of my complaint department. SO if you have any complaints - please go to Helen Waite.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:46 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Definition of pointless: Jobless people on Facebook updating their status to 'thank God it's the weekend'
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:44 by BEGO Comments (1)  


   messageicon When I die, I want to be cremated regardless of cost... I feel like I've urned it.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 22:20 by @The69Sheriff Comments (0)  



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