snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Don't eat the green snow!!!
←Rate | 03-17-2017 14:12 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon HEY PEOPLE DRIVING IN SNOW, IF TRAFFIC'S REALLY BAD MAKE SURE YOU TAKE YOUR EYES OFF THE ROAD AND TYPE IN A TWEET ABOUT IT, OK?
←Rate | 01-21-2012 13:31 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always have skis mounted on the roof of my car just in case I flip it and land in the snow.
←Rate | 01-20-2014 18:57 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lefties eat yellow snow on Winter Solstice.
←Rate | 12-25-2017 14:17 Comments (1)  


   messageicon In the future, imagine how many Go-Pros will be found buried under snow in the mountains containing the last moments of people's lives...
←Rate | 03-17-2016 12:42 by eengrms Comments (0)  


   messageicon Plan to change the air in your tires soon. Replace that winter air in your tires for best inflation during summer months. Most mechanics will do this for you for free on April 1st.
←Rate | 03-17-2018 11:04 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Disney purchased Lucasfilms, LTD?? I personally can't wait for some of those gems to start coming out. Particularly, Snow White and the Seven Storm Troopers, Swiss Family Skywalker and - my favorite - Song of the Sith...
←Rate | 10-31-2012 08:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Parents, How do you expect kids to listen to you when: Tarzan lives half naked. Cinderella comes back at midnight. Pinocchio lies all the time. Aladdin is the king of thieves. Batman drives at 320km/h. Sleeping beauty is lazy. Snow white sleeps with
←Rate | 04-23-2011 09:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cats are smarter than dogs, you'll never see 8 cats pulling some dumb a$$ through the snow!!
←Rate | 02-16-2010 20:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon How do you find will smith in the snow? Look for the fresh prints...
←Rate | 10-07-2010 11:18 by Thrasher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Snow White is my favorite Disney movie about a man trying to hook up with a woman who just wants to sleep.
←Rate | 12-15-2013 13:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passed out. when you wish upon a star...
←Rate | 05-14-2010 06:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Relationships are a winter sport..
←Rate | 11-28-2011 15:00 by @RonnieChapman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Belle: "My husband is a beast." Cinderella: "Mine still drives a pumpkin." Snow White: "My husband leaves me home with 7 little ones." Mermaid: "Mine wants me to use fishnet stockings." Sleeping Beauty: "I just pretend i'm asleep." Disney's Desperate Hous
←Rate | 12-07-2011 03:52 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do you know how much snow is too much snow to go to the liquor store?
←Rate | 12-15-2013 09:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm giving up snow for lent
←Rate | 02-13-2013 10:01 by Liliana Comments (0)  


   messageicon Found a Jelly Belly in my winter coat from last year. I ate it.
←Rate | 12-05-2014 23:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until ALL the birds have gone South for the Winter.
←Rate | 09-15-2013 09:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just looking at the snow angels I made. I'm definitely going to the gym tomorrow!
←Rate | 01-06-2015 21:46 by Depirts1 Comments (0)  


   messageicon figured out a way to turn my dishwasher into a snow remover. I handed my wife a shovel
←Rate | 06-16-2009 21:47 by mat2sm00th Comments (0)  


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