snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages

   Join the fight against high heating cost by supporting your local heating assistance program. Change your profile pic to a pic of your cold nipples and together we can stop the winter cold. The goal is to turn fb into all nipples by Dec 21st.

   When you realize winter is still 5 week away!

   Science Schmience. I think they've got it backwards. Birds don't fly south for the winter, they fly north for the summer. Nyah!

   Plan to change the air in your tires soon. Replace that winter air in your tires for best inflation during summer months. Most mechanics will do this for you for free on April 1st.

   Dear Punxsutawney Phil, If you are not frozen, please come out of your little home tomorrow morning with your eyes closed(so you don't see your shadow) and flip everyone off. That should sum up this winter.

   I once peed a girl's name in the snow, so don't tell me I don't know romance.

   An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Bull$hitt. Apples are dangerous. Just look at Eve, Snow White, Blackberry or any pig at a luau.

   Snow: where a couple of inches will keep a woman in bed all day.

   Thinking about suing my job for refusing to recognize my religion of being a bear and denying me my beliefs of winter hibernation.

   In the future, imagine how many Go-Pros will be found buried under snow in the mountains containing the last moments of people's lives...

   Sorry To Hear The Size Of Your Snow Angel Made You Realize You Need To Go To The Gym.

   Tis the season again, the first snow! Please let me say to all idiots who think that since they have an SUV you somehow gain super powers and are invincible, TIRES ON ICE ARE TIRES ON ICE your 4x4 this doesn't stop you from sliding on ice you morons!

   HEY PEOPLE DRIVING IN SNOW, IF TRAFFIC'S REALLY BAD MAKE SURE YOU TAKE YOUR EYES OFF THE ROAD AND TYPE IN A TWEET ABOUT IT, OK?

   The Eskimo's allegedly have 52 words for snow. I have several words for snow also...

   This is pure snow! Do you have any idea what the street value of this mountain is?

   It looks like everyone wants Jon Snow to play NFL...he wont bend a knee

   I always have skis mounted on the roof of my car just in case I flip it and land in the snow.

   I've heard that the Eskimos have over 80 words to describe snow. Hell, they should get jobs in the Lipstick Color Naming Department at Revlon

   every summer people try to work on their "summer body" ...i've been working on my winter body for years

   Wouldn't it be awesome if the snow relief package people threw rolls of paper towels at us?