Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Do not forget kids "crack is cheap , crack is whack". Rip Whitney.

   That moment when you leave your facebook up around your friends when you get a msg, friend request, and a few notifications to make it look like your popular

   Money is paper, paper come from trees thus money grow on trees!

   I love deer season, Especially when I am driving alone in my Blazer , it's amazing how fast I purposely turn into a Comacazi pilot when I see a deer in the middle of the road-

   So its only B3G0 fool who gets away with re-p0sting old material up in this b!tch?

   happy father's day to all my daddy's... no homo though

   uses the exclamat!on po!nt a l!ttle too much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

   staying away from those suckers because they will give you cavities, and keep your grass short so you can see those snakes!!!!!

   Quotations i got ice in my veins, blood in my eyes, hate in my heart, love in my mind

   wonders if who ever reads this would they ever make it to the end.. hehe they finished what losers

   Likes her coffee catffinated

   Now is the time to get ready for 2010! Whatever your plans, write them out and map your way!

   I don't get how holding the door for a stranger is polite but flushing the urinal for them isn't.

   If exercise eliminates excess fat how come some people have double chins?

   Don’t be selfish by asking god to find you a soul mate. God has bigger fish to fry, like cure diseases and save lives.

   ....and THAT is how I won the staring contest against Mt Rushmore.

   If you are a por n addict, it’s not advisable to go to church, coz when the women kneel you anticipate something else.

   waiting for the chinese to develope a way for me to order my food online and not have to listen to their crap anymore.

   Did you know some female spiders eat the male spider after mating? She's like "Ya sure I'll have your babies and you for dinner"

   ''Do I look like a motherf**king comedian? Don't f**king heckle me. I'm Kanye motherf**king West. I'm dead f**king serious.''