Funny Status Messages

   Thought the commercial showing the president as a chicken (or was it a c@ck) was pretty funny

   Would like to thank all you Colt fans for talking so much Sh!t it makes winning so much better!

   Gary Busey kicked @ss during his halftime performance.....

   Hey Facebook, thanks for updating the style of your page for the 15th time ... I am really amazed that I get a different segment of the news feed everytime I refresh also. Great job! /endSarcasm

   God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I had to kill because they ate all my oreos and were always peeing on my toilet seat.

   - In my effort to be considered a "normal person", I shall now close my eyes, create fictional scenario's in my head and lay still for atleast 8 hours.

   Many Jägerbombs = (Good Times + Memory Loss) / (Loss of Balance - Contents of Stomach * Hangover^115)

   What jackass put up the saints and field goal posts comment??? The Saints scored the most points in the NFL this year. Very smart fan!!

   How do you keep a New Orleans Saint out of your yard? Put up goal posts.

   SHOPPERS: Bored with writing lists for that weekly shop? Simply find discarded lists in trolleys/baskets, and use them! Its spiced up my life.....

   If I root for the Saints today... does that count as going to church?

   I don't know who's apartment I stayed at last night, but I just showered here and their shampoo is PHENOMINAL.

   Love me or hate me its still an obsession...

   You do know that COLTS stand for Count On Loosing The Superbowl!!

   John Terry explained he didn't mean to have sex with Vanessa Perroncel - he just slipped while he was showing her how to take a penalty.

   Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

   this morning I came to my senses.......I didn't like it....very unfamiliar...very strange......I liked it better not having them....not going back there.

   the dude, playing the dude, disguised as another dude.

   reading his friends' statuses and adding 'in bed' to the end of each one.

   nodding off at the computer. I think I've been here too long. Just one more website and then I'll check my facebook page again. Oh yeah, I gotta make sure I got that email. After that, I'll go to bed.