Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 6014 of 6371
when the roomates away, in my underwear I will stay
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04-11-2010 23:04 by ANGELA
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"You want the booth?!? You can't handle the booth!" Jack Nicholson working at Perkins
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04-11-2010 22:14 by Tim
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Phil mickleson has by far the sloppiest titties of any professional athletes that I have ever seen.
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04-11-2010 20:45
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Tiger Woods ended his week at the Masters with an impressive 69.. His golf was also quite successful.
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04-11-2010 20:14
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Velcro is a ripoff
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04-11-2010 20:13
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Justin Bieber's songs are just about as deep as his voice...
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04-11-2010 20:07 by Ace
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-- The most used sexual position for married couples is the doggie position... The husband sits and begs for it while the wife rolls over and plays dead.
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04-11-2010 19:53 by Y.P
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Trust is like a piece of paper,once its crumpled it cant be perfect!
It recently became apparent to me that the letters 'T' and 'G' are far too close together on a keyboard. This is why I'll never be ending an e-mail with the phrase "Regards" ever again.
normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.
used to have a machete, but times have changed
just realized life hasn't changed much. 15years ago on Sunday night I was wishing I was grown up and had a job. Today night I'm up wishing I was in school.......
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04-11-2010 16:54 by samdave69
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I see Woods is going after Couples now.
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04-11-2010 16:52
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looks like arnold schwarzenegger...but before he begins taking steroids.
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04-11-2010 16:27
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you can get whatever you want in this life,if you have self confidence,determination...and huge t!ts.
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04-11-2010 16:07
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Only 259 more shopping days till Christmas
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04-11-2010 15:29 by Santa
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Anyone else feel a bit like Hitler when someone tells them about the president dying and all you can think is "It's only Poland".
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04-11-2010 14:28
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We have a saying in our house. Well, to be accurate my wife has a saying. I have a listening.
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04-11-2010 14:17
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Canada gave the world Justin Beiber. As a canadian, I just wanna say sorry everybody. Our bad. No need to retaliate with nukes or anything.
women have a long,endless list for man to please them,while men have only a list with two wishes for their women: Naked and bring beer
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04-11-2010 13:36 by Mr.CuteB
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