Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5868 of 6371
Justin Bieber is approximately the same diameter as the oil pipe in the Gulf......is anybody thinking what I'm thinking?
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06-08-2010 01:38 by jdpower
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Next for BP: they're going to add balsamic vinegar to the oil; turning the Gulf into a nice vinaigrette.
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06-08-2010 01:36 by jdpower
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Sign of the times when you don't take a newspaper or magazine to the bathroom with you anymore. Instead you take your iPad with you. Be sure to wipe the screen when your done!!!
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06-08-2010 01:31
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its very sad Adriana Xenides has died and I'm not even going to make a joke about it. That would be in_p_o_ri_te
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06-08-2010 00:04
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25% off this thursday
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06-07-2010 22:19 by colbs
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Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired
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06-07-2010 21:57 by BEGO
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I fought the law and....the lawyers won.
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06-07-2010 21:55
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Beauty is in the Eye Of The Beer Holder.
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06-07-2010 21:54
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Biggest trade to date: Lakers to trade Jack Nicholson
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06-07-2010 21:45 by Joser
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Do you believe in love at first sight? Or do I have to walk past you again?
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06-07-2010 21:36 by BEGO
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I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
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06-07-2010 21:26 by BEGO
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I just taped magnets to the bottom of my empty coffee cup and attached it to the top of my car... Can't wait to see how many people will try and flag me down...
The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart
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06-07-2010 21:16 by BEGO
Comments (3)
I think “be yourself” is about the worst advice you can give to some people.
Coffee can make you jumpy and irritable. There are also negative effects.
thinks the BP executive management team that's responsible for the day to day running of the company should be the ones cleaning the oil spill!
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06-07-2010 21:07
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if the broom fits...RIDE IT!
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06-07-2010 20:27
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get a life is your only copyright
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06-07-2010 20:16
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you're allways late, your work is slack, you bit#h and wine behind my back, a 2hr lunch 4u is quick, and twice a week you call in sick, i've hated you since the day you were hired, get to work are your fat a#s is fired
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06-07-2010 20:11
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You are so pathetic that Tom wont even be friends with you on myspace.
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06-07-2010 19:48 by Tracy
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