Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny status message updates for FaceBook or Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon wear his wife's eyeglasses because she wants him to see things her way
←Rate | 06-22-2009 18:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes you have to let go to see if there was anything worth holding on to
←Rate | 06-22-2009 18:16 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon wounders If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
←Rate | 06-22-2009 18:12 by JonathanMC.com Comments (0)  


   messageicon you never really know a man until you have divorced him.
←Rate | 06-22-2009 17:48 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Out like the Cavs!
←Rate | 06-22-2009 15:58 by KingTut | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks there are better things in life than alcohol, but alcohol makes up for not having them
←Rate | 06-22-2009 15:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys: No Shirt, No Service - Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
←Rate | 06-22-2009 15:35 by KingTut | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon say's never go to a Doctor whose plants are dead in the waiting room!
←Rate | 06-22-2009 15:32 by KingTut Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wandering if your free tonight, or is it gonna cost me?
←Rate | 06-22-2009 15:31 by KingTut | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
←Rate | 06-22-2009 13:40 by the wilson | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Spongbob for Prime Minister
←Rate | 06-22-2009 09:02 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon marks the spot
←Rate | 06-22-2009 03:26 by Anonymous. | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon the entrepreneur in me thinks I should be selling rocks in the streets of Iran.
←Rate | 06-21-2009 23:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon if you desire it, I'll aquire it.
←Rate | 06-21-2009 17:24 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering what people in China call their good dishes?????
←Rate | 06-21-2009 17:01 by Rusty Comments (0)  


   messageicon kind of likes ceilings, maybe she'll even become a fan?
←Rate | 06-21-2009 16:29 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonders if Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
←Rate | 06-21-2009 16:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering what spiders think of our own web.
←Rate | 06-21-2009 15:57 by ftinho | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon has his popularity validated by the best organizations.... Even the Police consider me a person of interest!
←Rate | 06-21-2009 14:51 by Peebs Comments (0)  


   messageicon wants to borrow your top
←Rate | 06-21-2009 14:35 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


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