Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5726 of 6370
Ellen DeGeneres finds it hard to judge people and hurt their feeling so she is leaving American Idol. Producers have put in a call to Mel Gibson.
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07-30-2010 23:34
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if I had a peso for every lame mafia wars update you posted this week, I could afford to put a real hit on your azz!
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07-30-2010 22:54 by rush1oc
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I think I see a light through the tunnel...hope its my friends with a 2 million watt spotlight and not a train....
yeah she was hot...til she opened up her mouth and the trailer fell out
Im better at sex than anyone; now all I need is a partner.
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07-30-2010 20:59 by Chapin
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playing 'call of duty' on my laptop on the plane was a bad idea
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07-30-2010 20:39
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Do you ever look at girls' pictures on facebook and feel them up with your cursor??? --uhhh, either do i!
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07-30-2010 19:55 by geez
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Has come to the conclusion that the weekend is a man, it comes too quick then you don't hear from it for a week!!
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07-30-2010 19:31
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So, was Snooki taken to juvie??
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07-30-2010 19:19
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i like kids, but I dont think I could eat a whole one
You looked good until you said something stupid!!!
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07-30-2010 18:01 by @steady
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sent my mom a text asking if she wanted to get pedis today but iPhone auto corrected it to penis...awkward.
if you have trouble tying knots...handcuffs make the perfect gift
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07-30-2010 16:46
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Due to the success of Toy story 3. BP are in talks to release, "Try Finding Nemo Now".
New Year's eve practice tonight
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07-30-2010 16:22 by levon
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wonderong how long you should wait before you should tell a highway it's adopted
looks arent everything, but they sure do help
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07-30-2010 15:52 by Colin
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GIRLS are so hard to understand.... If you go out with your boyz = ur too much of a player. If you want to be with them a lot = ur too needy .. WTF !
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07-30-2010 15:38 by lui
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I think it's pretty funny that people don't have a problem hitting the key pad several times to type out statuses, but FLIP OUT and start talking about starting farms on fire and killing animals instead of just hitting the one key "ignore" on a farm requ
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07-30-2010 15:21 by AT
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If you dont like being tailgated then dont play movies I like.
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07-30-2010 15:16
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