Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny status message updates for FaceBook or Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon One tectonic plate bumped into another and said....."Sorry, my fault"
←Rate | 09-13-2009 07:20 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't know about you, but I'm sick of seeing disabled people being pushed around...
←Rate | 09-12-2009 15:27 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  

   messageicon SUPERBAD and McLOVIN every minute of it.
←Rate | 09-12-2009 10:38 Comments (0)  

   messageicon should shout "You Lie!" in church just to see what happens...
←Rate | 09-10-2009 14:33 Comments (0)  

   messageicon hasn't spoken to bigfoot in a while.
←Rate | 09-09-2009 14:52 by boozecoma Comments (0)  

   messageicon Yes I know it's 09/09/09 I don't need 100 text messages letting me know. I have a calendar!
←Rate | 09-09-2009 09:56 Comments (0)  

   messageicon wondering if the last one out could possibly switch off the light at the end of the tunnel?
←Rate | 09-09-2009 08:46 Comments (0)  

   messageicon just heard about the scientist that wants to rename the planet Uranus because it's rude. It's true, Google it! I reckon that's a damn good idea...let's call it Urectum instead.
←Rate | 09-09-2009 08:45 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life
←Rate | 09-08-2009 19:12 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Saw It... Wanted It... Had A Fit... Got It!
←Rate | 09-08-2009 19:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks this Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me
←Rate | 09-08-2009 19:05 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
←Rate | 09-08-2009 19:03 Comments (0)  

   messageicon "Doh!, the stuff that buys me beer, Ray, the guy who sells me beer, Me, the one who drinks the beer.Far, a long run to get beer, So, I'll have another beer, La, I'll have another beer, Tea, no thanks I'm drinking beer and that's why I'm not here! "
←Rate | 09-08-2009 19:03 by cj Comments (0)  

   messageicon loves how obama gives a speech to kids about the importance of school while 3/4 of the kids in the country are IN school
←Rate | 09-08-2009 16:33 Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks the newest version of the game "Monopoly" should come with a government bail-out option....
←Rate | 09-08-2009 14:16 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Was up all night wondering where the sun had gone. Then it dawned on me
←Rate | 09-08-2009 10:05 by Bren1957 Comments (0)  

   messageicon 100% positive that he isn't sure!
←Rate | 09-08-2009 00:56 by Mike Comments (0)  

   messageicon just spit out his stride gum.
←Rate | 09-07-2009 21:15 by skillaz Comments (0)  

   messageicon stop the bus let my friend jack off...
←Rate | 09-06-2009 21:54 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear Pringles, Now that I am no longer a child, I cannot fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness. Work on that.
←Rate | 09-05-2009 08:25 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  

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