Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5574 of 6370
I am REALLY good at what I do. You know, procrastinating and stuff.
I have been checking facebook less and less. If this continues, I'll eventually forget about all those people for the 2nd time.
doing the 'Fandango'...
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09-25-2010 17:19
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This is what will happen if you look like me............(SMACK)
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09-25-2010 15:33
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(SINGS) this is the Song that Never ends.. it just goes on and on my friend.. Some ppl started singing it not knowing what it was, & they'll continue singing it 4ever just because... LOL!! Bet your singing it now too! YW!
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09-25-2010 14:41
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Maury: "Darth Vader, you.... ARE the father." Luke: "Nooooo!"
I love the way you laugh....mostly because your boobs jiggle when you do :)
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09-25-2010 14:08 by @TeeWuu86
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Don't wait untill friday, start your weekend at monday !!
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09-25-2010 14:03
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When nudists put on a play, do they argue about who has the biggest part?
whenever I start to get tired of being single... I go sleep on the couch to remember what being in a relationship is like.
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09-25-2010 13:37 by JaxWylde
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3 bottles of bleach: $15.00. One rope, 3 rolls of duct tape, and a shovel: $35.00. 3 boxes of trash bags: $10.00. The look on the cashier's face: Priceless!
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09-25-2010 13:37
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I told my ex I felt like killing her, and she said I needed professional help. .... So I hired a hitman
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09-25-2010 13:21 by @TeeWuu86
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My Idea for a church bulletin. "Stop, drop, and roll won't work in hell ."
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09-25-2010 13:18 by @TeeWuu86
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Hows about you give me your number while I'm still interested.
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09-25-2010 13:16 by @TeeWuu86
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Lets play post office... You lick and I'll deliver.
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09-25-2010 13:15 by @TeeWuu86
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What did Curt Cobain say to Courtney Love before he died?... Holes gonna be big!
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09-25-2010 12:34 by boo
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Did you know..... your middle toe is a radar detector for chair legs??!
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09-25-2010 11:56
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what does a shingle and a fat chick have in common? They both get nailed by mexicans..
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09-25-2010 11:19 by boo
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My three unwritten rules : 1. 2. 3.
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09-25-2010 10:34 by Aaron
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sleeps well with others
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09-25-2010 09:07
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