santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon thinks Christmas must be near. Just found a partridge in one of the pear trees on Farmtown
←Rate | 12-17-2009 18:51 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm shaking my laptop trying to figure out what's in the presents under my virtual Christmas tree..
←Rate | 12-17-2009 23:24 Comments (0)  

   messageicon was surprised to find a Christmas present from last year while getting the decorations out. The kids were all excited as I opened the box. What a pity it was a dead puppy
←Rate | 12-19-2009 08:17 by deithy Comments (0)  

   messageicon if good girls sit on santa's lap, do bad ones sit on his face?
←Rate | 12-19-2009 11:37 Comments (0)  

   messageicon We made Gingerbread Man cookies today, and I'm still laughing. My kids were acting out Shrek with them, and one was Lord Farquad: "I'm not the monster, you are! Now tell me where are the others!" The other was the GBM: "Eat Me!" Christmas with kids = win
←Rate | 12-19-2009 19:01 by F Comments (0)  

   messageicon Anyone know about how much Santa weighs ... I am currently setting a trap and need some info.
←Rate | 12-21-2009 03:21 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Christmas is the time of year when we want our pasts forgotten and our presents remembered!
←Rate | 12-21-2009 09:19 by olemissman79 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Don't get your hopes up. Santa has about as much of a chance of bringing "Hope and Change" as a clown does.
←Rate | 12-21-2009 10:35 by SCURRY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear Santa: if you ignore all my actions during weekends and all the alcohol I drank, you'll see that 6 out of 12 months I was a good boy, wich makes me 50% good...It's up to you to see the glass half empty or half full
←Rate | 12-21-2009 14:09 Comments (0)  

   messageicon out spreading Christmas Cheer by streaking at sporting events.
←Rate | 12-21-2009 15:03 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Santa: If you ignore my actions during weekends (& sometimes the workday) and all the Vicodin I took, you'll see that 6 out of 12 months, I was a good boy, which makes me 50% good. It's up to you- see the glass half empty or half full. Do the right thing!
←Rate | 12-21-2009 23:43 by Snotty D Comments (0)  

   messageicon Wants Santa to bring me one of the hot girls thats on his naughty list
←Rate | 12-22-2009 12:47 Comments (0)  

   messageicon wonderin if this will be the year. Santa hasn't visited me since I moved out the first time. Can't figure it out!
←Rate | 12-22-2009 16:59 by Prankster Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? - You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit
←Rate | 12-22-2009 19:26 by zar Comments (0)  

   messageicon Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered
←Rate | 12-22-2009 19:28 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just left Walmart, to get out of there, I had to strangle 6 moms, run over 12 kids, and kick 1 grandma in a scooter. There goes my present from Santa.
←Rate | 12-22-2009 22:53 Comments (0)  

   messageicon To America's welfare recipients..."your welcome for a great year and a free Christmas"...from the rest of us hard working Americans that work for hard your well being every day.  
←Rate | 12-23-2009 02:44 Comments (1)  

   messageicon Dear Santa, Define Good. Love X
←Rate | 12-23-2009 14:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon looking forward to the family tradition of listening to the UK's No 1 after Xmas dinner. Can't wait to see the look on my mum's face!
←Rate | 12-23-2009 17:32 by deithy Comments (0)  

   messageicon asked Santa Claus for a boyfriend this Christmas... He gave me a rain check instead... lol :)
←Rate | 12-23-2009 18:29 Comments (0)  

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