Funny Status Messages for FacebookStatus message updates and sayings for your Facebook, Twitter, or profile.
X says My integrity is not for sale and won't be until it can fetch a better price.
X says By the time you can afford a high definition television you no longer have the high definition eyesight necessary to enjoy it.
X You know you're getting older when the candles cost more than the cake.
X says Homeless people are like the raccoons of metropolitan areas. Always coming out at night to route through your garbage can with their furry little faces and opposable thumbs.
X says I saw a jug of 2% milk. I'd actually prefer the whole thing be milk.
X says The international symbol for marriage is a white flag.
X Nice guys finish.... In the shower
X is driving the Hummer on Earth Day!!
X says first you want same sex marriage, what's next...same sex divorce
X Conserve water on earth day, drink more beer....
X Everytime she logs onto facebook she feels like she's reading people's diaries. Facebook should change its name to Dear Diary!!!
X F*ck Earth Day. I used to be a planet too. - Pluto
X but officer, the sign says "no shirt, no shoe, no service"...is says NOTHING about pants!
X Some people get so upset when you delete them from your fb friends list. What is the big deal it's not like we're real friends and hang out everyday.
X says If you cant dazzle them with your brillance, baffle them with your bull sh!t
X says The best two kinds of beer in this world are....Cold & Free..
X is at work, online researching how to be more productive at work
X says Happy Earth Day!! Time to plant all the greens burned 2 days ago.....
X is wishing everyone a "Happy Earth Day", and is reminding you to keep our planet clean, it's not Uranis..
X Earth Day - Keeping Earth cleaning than Uranus...