santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I wrap all my Christmas gifts in bubble wrap.....it's like giving two gifts in one!
←Rate | 12-12-2013 15:28 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always thought my dad was great when I was growing up, he always got so pissed off every year when santa didnt bring me presents. I felt so lucky to be his son.
←Rate | 12-26-2011 20:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's February. Think now may be a good time to take down your freakin' Christmas lights? Hmm?
←Rate | 02-04-2011 15:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This is ridiculous its July 8th... Neighbors are still shooting off fireworks, one almost caught my Christmas decorations on fire..
←Rate | 07-08-2019 15:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't wait for a empty Christmas wrapping paper tube to bonk someone over the head with!
←Rate | 11-27-2016 09:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll be home for Christmas.....and in therapy by New Years.
←Rate | 12-08-2016 09:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a problem with gingerbread people living in houses made of their flesh, but I promised not to bring it up and ruin Christmas again this year.
←Rate | 12-01-2020 08:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do people who send out family Christmas cards want from us?
←Rate | 12-16-2018 09:35 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The liquor store clerk just wished me a Merry Christmas. As if he wasn't going to see me 5 more times before then.
←Rate | 12-23-2018 07:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Ho ho oh my God I can’t stop giggling!” -Santa Claus, after eating cookies in homes across Canada
←Rate | 10-21-2018 06:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There is nothing stopping a condom company from saying they are the only condoms worn by Santa Claus
←Rate | 09-26-2019 05:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lady stabbed a guy singing Christmas Songs at the Mall. I bailed her out.
←Rate | 10-12-2019 12:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can tell the age of an artificial Christmas tree by the lines of duct tape around the box it's stored in.
←Rate | 12-05-2019 11:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm 45 and I would still be tickled pink to wake up Christmas morning to a Barbie Dream House with accessories.
←Rate | 12-05-2019 11:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This year my mother gave my son a drum set for Christmas. Which surprised me. I said to her don't you remember how you hated it when I played the drums when I was a kid? She replyed with a smile , I remember.
←Rate | 01-11-2020 19:06 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon To all those who received a book from me as a Christmas present....They are due back at the library today.
←Rate | 01-24-2013 06:29 by Stan Brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just saw a Christmas tree drive by with a Smart Car strapped to the bottom of it.
←Rate | 12-16-2012 20:19 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon f you feel sad, remember: There are people out there right now buying last-minute Christmas presents for their cats.
←Rate | 12-22-2011 08:52 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon This "fancy" wine rack I got for Christmas is total crap. NONE of these boxes fit at all
←Rate | 01-29-2010 14:29 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon December is the month when the kids begin to discuss what to get Dad for Christmas. Some insist on a shirt; others a pair of socks, and the argument always ends in a tie.
←Rate | 12-18-2011 11:07 by Daheavy1 Comments (0)  




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