Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon "What have I done?!! Everybody run!!" -Inventor of the boomerang
←Rate | 06-28-2011 10:48 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have come to the conclusion that Google must be female, as she has the answer to everything and Yahoo is a Male , pointless and never works ..
←Rate | 06-28-2011 19:46 by Danny Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a reason Congress begins with the word con. Con is the oppsosite of pro, so Congress must be the opposite of progress.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 23:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mum told me once that she judges how good a film is by the number of tissues she gets through....funny really, I have the same system
←Rate | 04-08-2011 05:10 by Jonny barrell Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wish Adam would have spent more than just a rib.....
←Rate | 06-10-2011 23:02 by greg2missy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.”
←Rate | 06-19-2011 12:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've never seen Scarface, but I have quoted the "little friend" line at some really inappropriate times.
←Rate | 06-26-2011 08:50 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon discovered today that goldfish do not like jello.
←Rate | 01-28-2011 13:59 by jack Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened to someone else and you have the photos you can upload and tag them in on Facebook.
←Rate | 01-31-2011 09:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The hardest question of the weekend...can or bottle?
←Rate | 02-04-2011 02:02 by JimJR89 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The wife is playing Wii table tennis and screaming at the TV. The kids are hiding in their room. LMAO!
←Rate | 02-05-2011 11:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish Google knew if he still loved me..
←Rate | 02-19-2011 13:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This weekend: The Oscars, who will make the best dressed list? Who cares? The question I want answered is who will make the best undressed list!
←Rate | 02-25-2011 06:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think I may have misunderstood my boss when she told me that she loved seeing me hard at work.
←Rate | 02-26-2011 17:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If there's one thing I know it's God does love a good joke.
←Rate | 03-01-2011 04:14 by RoN Comments (0)  


   messageicon Grand Theft Auto is the only sourse in which I am able to express myself freely without any consequences
←Rate | 03-04-2011 19:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think women are born with the right to warm their cold toes on men.
←Rate | 10-11-2011 10:21 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon its National Coming Out Day. What ever you do don't take that call from Grandma. Trust Me on this.
←Rate | 10-11-2011 19:14 by the FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".
←Rate | 04-24-2011 12:04 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Procrastinators unite!…Tomorrow..
←Rate | 04-27-2011 00:54 by Usucknoob Comments (0)  




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