Mom or Mother Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'Mom or Mother': View All Messages
Page: 20 of 33

   messageicon Those saying what a great guy Jovan Belcher was seem to overlook he just killed his baby's mother!!
←Rate | 12-01-2012 21:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm the one your mother warned you about......to never let me be the one that got away.
←Rate | 12-05-2012 01:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mother always said "if you have nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all." I hope she's happy my mime career has taken off.
←Rate | 12-10-2012 10:40 by LadyInRed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm taking my family to see the Nutcracker on Saturday. Of course I'm talking about my mother-in-law, not the show.
←Rate | 12-19-2012 22:51 by Jeff W Comments (0)  


   messageicon There are 3 types of females in this world. There are ladies you introduce to your mother, there are women you introduce to your friends and there are girls you show the door to
←Rate | 12-22-2012 14:21 by Jackoo Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife's mother was here for Xmas dinner. My youngest says to me, "Hey Dad! When are you gonna do that trick?!?" "I said, "Do what trick?" He goes, "You know. You said if granny comes for Christmas you'd climb the walls!"
←Rate | 12-28-2012 06:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Mother: Clean your room, family is coming over. Me: Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize the gathering would be held in my bedroom.
←Rate | 12-30-2012 21:19 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon A pregnant Khadarshian is the last thing the world need right now, let alone pregnant by Kanye West. Reminds me of that reproducing mother Alien in he Aliens movie.
←Rate | 12-31-2012 03:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some mistakes only a mother can love.
←Rate | 01-04-2013 11:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Roses are red violets are blue, porn hub is down. So your mother's Facebook will do
←Rate | 01-06-2013 13:06 by Jackoo Comments (0)  


   messageicon I would of had a better comeback but I left the come back in your mother
←Rate | 01-06-2013 16:39 by Jackoo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men Eve could have married, and she didn't have to hear about how well Adam’s mother cooked.
←Rate | 01-07-2013 19:00 by Anita Dicken Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mother told me: "alcohol is your worst enemy." Jesus said: "love your enemy." Case closed.
←Rate | 01-23-2013 15:26 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon The worst part about watching porn on your smart phone is getting interrupted by texts from your mother...
←Rate | 01-29-2013 13:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every call from my mother is a judgment call.
←Rate | 02-12-2013 13:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You fell sad because you didn't have a Valentine on Valentine's Day? Some people don't have a mom on Mother's Day or a dad on Father's Day so shut up.
←Rate | 02-15-2013 09:16 Comments (1)  


   messageicon In Mother Russia, we don't shoot for the stars, the stars shoot for us
←Rate | 02-16-2013 19:28 by Yaj Comments (0)  


   messageicon I slammed the car door on my fingers this afternoon. In related news, there's an 83% chance that my nephew just added "Mother*ucker" to his vocabulary.
←Rate | 03-05-2013 16:13 Comments (1)  


   messageicon My mother had morning sickness AFTER I was born.
←Rate | 03-18-2013 19:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Axe Bodyspray, Please create a new bottle that allows only one spary every 24 hours. Thank you for your consideration. Signed, Mother of a ten year old boy
←Rate | 03-18-2013 23:11 by Axel Comments (0)  




[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left