friday OR weekend Funny Status Messages

   This is odd?!?! The hour we lost this weekend was the one when I was planning to go to the gym.

   Memorial Day Weekend is coming up and Summer is just around the corner. I can tell because the UPS guy asked me to put sun block on his legs.

   A beer bottle may not be shaped like a Boomerang but it still comes back to me every weekend :-D ;-) :-)

   "Hello Wednesday morning....for a moment, I thought you were your friend, Friday! Forgive the disappointed look!"

   My girl and I decided never to go to sleep angry at each other. We’ve been awake since Friday

   A rainy Friday is still better than a sunny Monday...

   The Rapture is this weekend nobody make any plans! WAIT JUST A MINUTE this came from the guy that predicted that Judgement day was happening September 6, 1994.... I wonder how that worked out for him?

   Y couldn't judgement day begin on Monday!? why did it had to ruin my weekend!?

   You know you have a Facebook addiction if seeing the movie "The social network" is your Friday night fun!!

   FYI - Remember to set your clocks forward an hour this weekend because we can only afford 23 hours a day now due to the sequester......

   My plans for this weekend are so top secret even I don't know what they are.

   I made a huge TO DO list for this weekend. I just can’t figure out who’s going to do it.

   My girlfriend told me she bought a really sexy dress just for me. I'm planning on wearing it on Friday.

   50 Shades of Grey beat Sponge Bob at the weekend box office. Sponge Bob could have stayed at number 1 but he refused to remove his square-pants

   And on Friday God created alcohol, and Adam was happy! It had been a long first week with Eve

   Weekend settings activated, please don't call unless if its alcohol, food, fun, alcohol, fun and food again. All problems deferred to Monday...

   Why is Monday so far away from Friday but Friday is so close to Monday?

   Dear Week, I am leaving you for the Weekend. I would say it's not you, it's me, but let's face it, it was you. Sincerely, Me

   I guess Black Friday started early in Ferguson

   Friday!!! I’m so glad you are back. I’m sorry you had to see me with Monday-Thursday, but I swear I was thinking of you the whole time.