derfmeister Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon If you're gonna order a salad with ham, raisins, peanuts, croutons & extra ranch, just order a freaking sandwich.
←Rate | 07-26-2011 23:29 by derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon I guess Black Friday started early in Ferguson
←Rate | 11-25-2014 00:02 by derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon If Voldemort is such a powerful wizard, why can't he conjure up a new nose?
←Rate | 07-25-2011 22:33 by derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm trying to go back to my original shape. 7 lbs. 9oz..
←Rate | 01-02-2012 06:23 by Derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just realize its XXX Olympics. Why aren't the people naked when they get their medals??
←Rate | 08-01-2012 00:49 by Derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon Wrong # call = boring. Wrong text message = fun. Some1 text me "Carl, where the hell r u?" I responded "sex change, call you back as Carla."
←Rate | 07-31-2011 21:54 by derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon BBQ at Bear Mountain
←Rate | 02-13-2013 11:16 by derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon Curiosity just landed on Mars. I hope there will be a picture of the 3 titties lady..
←Rate | 08-06-2012 03:27 by Derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why don't chicken breast have nipples?
←Rate | 01-22-2013 06:49 by Derfmeister Comments (0)  

   messageicon So did Queen Elsa put a spell on the Kingdom of Buffalo?
←Rate | 11-20-2014 00:48 by derfmeister Comments (0)  


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