love Funny Status Messages

   I must be the only person that didn't like Avatar. I fell asleep an hour into it. I mean seriously, if I wanted to see a love story I would have rented "The Notebook" then promptly shot myself in the face.

   Love her, Respect her, Surprise her, Never lie, Care about her, Text her first, Keep her happy, and make her feel beautiful

   She says I am her one and only love, but she has a whole photo album dedicated to Brad Pitt while my single pic on her page is languishing under wall pictures.

   Love doesn't ask why, it ask "When and where?"

   Some call it love, I call it vodka.

   Quick, someone take one for the team and fall in love with me. Happy Valentine's Day.

   Love fades with time, shape, weight, looks and bank balance.

   "If you love someone, set them free. If they come back with a couple police officers, you'll know" that you're an as$-hole.

   Amongst all the beautiful women in this world.. There's always an idiot ex-boyfriend, who still expects her love again.

   "We always deceive ourselves twice about the people we love - first to their advantage, then to their disadvantage."

   Follow what you Love, Learn what you Live, and eventually you will Live what you Love...

   I love taking the grocery store up on their offer to carry my groceries out to my car for me

   Real men who care for, cherish and love a woman faithfully, deserve the butthole at least once..

   What's 7 inches long with a purple head and women love it? ... A twenty pound note!

   My Love is Like Hell! My Family is like Heaven, My Friends are the Best, & I'm Completely Drunk!

   You know you are in love with a guy when you think about having sex with him.

   I love my new phone. I can now undate my status while crossing the stre

   Your hate for Trump only give him more attention while your love for Bernie is forgotten

   my mum thinks LOL stands for "lots of love" and texted me "Your uncle just died. LOL."

   Love is a piano dropped from a fourth story window, and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.