Prostitute Funny Status Messages

   Expecting truth from corporate media is like expecting love from a prostitute. That’s not why they exist.

   Fellas; Someone you are unable to hang out with when you are broke is not your girlfriend. That’s a prostitute.

   You really have to hand it to the blind prostitute..."

   So I met this prostitute who said she'd do anything for $10. Guess who got his car washed?

   A prostitute just told me she would do anything for $10... guess who just got their car washed!

   Free Tip: If a prostitute has nice teeth and carries a purse, she's a cop.

   while I drink my coffee, I oftentimes stare out the window and ask myself: Am I attractive enough to prostitute?

   Passed a vampire, a zombie, and a prostitute on the way to work tonight. Not sure which ones were in costume...

   just seen a homeless dude with a sign that said "too ugly to prostitute."

   "Every time I see a mattress on top of a car I think it's a prostitute making house calls."

   I JUST SAW MCDONALDS NOW IS SERVING OATMEAL. HMMM THAT'S LIKE GOING TO A PROSTITUTE FOR A KISS......

   Does a prostitute file pregnancy as a work-related accident?

   A hot chick with all her teeth and original limbs at a bowling alley is alway a cop posing as a prostitute.

   Hiring someone attractive does necessarily not mean they will be a productive employee...unless this person is a prostitute.

   If I slept with a prostitute, when we finished I would tell her that I am also a prostitute and we can just call it even.

   who is the biggest prostitute alive? Mrs. pacman , because for 25 cents that bi*ch will swallow balls until she dies!

   Teacher asks: What is the difference between a prostitute, a girlfriend and a wife.Student replies: Prepaid, post paid and unlimited plan.

   Great News for YOU during these financially challenging times. I found a prostitute who charges by the inch. Obviously, I can't afford her, but I thought you might enjoy an inexpensive night out.

   If I wanted a job where I got screwed every day, I would have became a prostitute.

   everybody needs sex. we need stories to tell are friends. Like "the prostitute gave the money back... no lie."